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45 Things I learned in 45 Years of Living

shutterstock_154213475How old are You?

Loaded question, huh??

Some do not feel comfortable divulging this kind of information.

Personally, I don’t mine. I turned 45 on the 25th. (That’s my calendar age/chronological age.)

What’s my biological age?

What age is my life experience?

Emotional, mental, spiritual or intellectual age/experience: how do you put an age to any of that?!?

Age is tough to measure like inner person growth. One can “approximately” measure (aka guess) with some accuracy my height: 5’7.5-8″ or estimate my weight:110-112 lbs or less/more. Actually, these sorts of measurements mean little to me…

I find it both sad and comical that some put extremely high value on size and shape, height and weight. Yeah, it’s important to be well, but inner/spiritual/mental and emotional health is very important to overall wellness!

Of course, at one time in my younger life experience, I very much hated to be judged (valued/devalued) by outward appearances/height/weight/age/looks, etc. I still don’t like it, but I’ve accepted that this outer skinny frame does not measure entirely what I am or what I value: (i.e. the inner person of any frame)…aka The “secret person of the heart.”

Nor do my freckles and/or any wrinkles tell the whole story of me. I’ve earned these laugh lines and it’s a gift to have lived long enough to laugh as much or be considered older or aging. (Maybe ? at 45, I should now discover wrinkle remover?! -lol)

To age is privilege of life and longevity! It’s sad that some cultures do not value older ones and their wisdom. We can learn lots from the older life…

“Let age speak, and let a multitude of years declare wisdom.” (Job 32:7)

Sadly, many have not lived long enough to complain about aging. Personally, I feel every breath…I’ve ever taken is a privilege and an undeserved gift/blessing…so, I’m HAPPY to say: I’m now 45!

Would it be nice to look like I’m still 25…may be? may be not?

We live in a pop culture that idolizes youthful skin/beauty and muscle. Guess, it would be cool to look like I did at 25, (Hubby might like that ? maybe ?) yet have the knowledge, education and experience I now possess at 45…I’m not the same person. Imagine, what I will know/learn IF I live another 45 years. One of my grandmothers lived to be 91…a non-smoker. The other, a smoker, died of cancer, etc. in her 60’s.

I’ll take the wisdom and life experience of age and aging, but I don’t care much for the breakdown of the body in terms of aches and pains and/or vision loss, etc. I’m sure you have your own aches and pains, eh?

Have I learned anything of value these past 45 years?!? Let’s see: (For context please read: 44 Things I Learned)

Random stuff this human labeled “joanie” has learned thus far:

45. Each new Morning is a new beginning/gift.

44. Interdependence is harmony and independence is not. Interdependence is green-ecologically friendly and independence is not.

43. Making wise choices in Youth leads to longevity of life (aka old age).

42. I’m an over-achiever…who hopes for immortality!:)

41. Really caring is for the tough. (I truly CARE aka I’m tougher than most people think a sensitive/skinny girl could be...really!)

40. Compassion is true religion and true government. (Everything/anything else is fake/counterfeit not worth my time/life/breath!)

39. Self-control is more than and less than go and stop, talk or shut up.

38. Being friendly/outgoing can be dangerous, but worth the risk.

37. Risk takers know when to jump and how high (and for whom or not).

36. Love rules forever and not fear.

35. Choice is power and wellness. (I’ve never smoked and I don’t drink/over-indulge.) Moderation is key.

34. Never abuse or misuse any power…i.e. power of the tongue or hand, etc.

33. Agape Love is a Living Language. Fluently speak it/live it and live long…er.

32. Compassion literacy needs to be taught like reading…from infancy onward.

31. Everybody needs forgiveness including me (very much)!

30. Life and learning is making messes and learning to clean them up yourself.

29. I prefer (aka LOVE) clean, neat and organization.

28. Universal Laws/Organization simply put is a manifestation of Divine Intelligence/Mind.

27. Without patience and humility it is impossible to progressively learn aka grow in “accurate” knowledge.

26. Being a know-it-all is basically being close-minded.

25. Bird song is peaceful, soothing music.

24. Music is a strong manipulator of the mind/heart so choose wisely. Choose positive for positive results.

23. Wellness/Perfection is complete-healthy-functioning: spirituality, mentality, emotionality and physicality: all simultaneously balanced.

22. Moods/emotions come and go…being a slave to whim is stupid and deadly.

21. FAMILY is Precious…appreciate and respect, protect and preserve (immediate and extended). (THANKS CHATO & KIDS! And All My Global Brothers & Sisters Near and Far!🙂

20. Prioritize the more important things or life becomes mundane drudgery.

19. Mightily resist propaganda and embrace tightly education!

18. All children need/deserve a compassionate example from both parents that is worthy of imitation.

17.  (I’m only dust making mud pies…and hoping they’re tasty.)

16. Appreciate Friends and keep only compassionate ones close. Choose compassionate friends wisely.

15. Poetry is more than words.

14. Keeping a Positive Attitude means survival.

13. Pain passes just like gas -lol:)…excuse me. (both stink)

12. Cannot control unexpected events can only control my response(s).

11. Prepare, Persevere and Pray…lots!

10. Ancient Wisdom found in the Bible really/truly WORKS well when practiced/applied in one’s life.

9. Be cautious/selective…eat healthy brain/body food! AND exercise brain/body everyday.

8. Children grow-up too fast so, enJOY/cherish every precious moment with them! Parenthood is an AMAZING privilege/responsibility.

7. Climates change fast so, being flexible and adaptable is crucial.

6. Compassion, Wisdom and Peace are Worthwhile Pursuits!

5. Listen more and talk less.

4. All BreathingFragileLife deserves: Agape Love, Respect, Dignity and Compassion!:)

3. True Science and True Spirituality is compatible and complementary and not contradictory, but progressively changing and evidence-based.

2. THANKFUL to GOD the originator/organizer of LIFE for my life!:)

1. i have a lot to learn…still; obviously! 😉


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45 Things I learned in 45 Years of Living

Joan Winifred

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APA Reference
Winifred, J. (2014). 45 Things I learned in 45 Years of Living. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 27, 2020, from


Last updated: 1 Apr 2014
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