As I wrote in my earlier piece, for many of us wintertime is hibernating time. Like many animals, we yearn to rest, too. We yearn to slow down and sink into the quiet, into the warmth of a heavy blanket, into the core of who we are.
The new year tends to spark fresh starts. We get excited. We feel energized, motivated, and inspired. We brainstorm a slew of ideas. We set intentions. We clear out clutter. We begin all kinds of projects.
The way we usually set resolutions is rigid, punitive, militant and even callous.
We prepare several months for the holiday season. We make gift lists, and decorate our homes. We shop (and shop and shop), and wrap (and wrap and wrap). We bake and cook and clean. We stand in line to see Santa, and do other magical things. We listen to Christmas or Hanukkah music 24/7. We open our homes to loved ones, and curl up on the couch watching sweet movies.
Of course, you don't need permission from me for anything this holiday season. But just in case you needed to read the words from someone else, here they are:
Since I started writing Weightless (in 2009!), every year around this time, I’ve shared a list of last-minute gifts we can give to our loved ones and ourselves. I’ve combined those lists, updated them and added new ideas.
Writing is medicine. It's the ultimate form of self-care. Because it helps us to connect to, acknowledge, and release our emotions. It gives us perspective and insight so that we can better understand the impact, the lessons, the questions, and the pain. So we can come to terms with all of it, and accept it.
Around the dinner table, at the gym, at restaurants, at New Year's Eve parties, it's not uncommon for the conversation to turn to calories, cake, clothing sizes, diets and weight loss or gain.
"In relationships...I rarely feel worthy of love or worthy of anyone's attention, and so I feel like I'm always taking up people's time that is better spent elsewhere, or that I am not entertaining enough, or that a relationship with me doesn’t have enough positives."