5 thoughts on “How To Spot ‘Fat Talk’ So You Can Stop It

  • April 11, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    Great topic!! I can’t wait to read the strategies for dealing with it because I want to be a role model in this area 🙂

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  • April 12, 2012 at 8:41 am

    I hope the author will discuss how to do what the title of her books says: How to Stop Confusing What You Look Like with Who You Are. Because I have no idea how to do that at all.

    When I am fat, people ignore me. When I am thin, I get lots of attention. As I lose weight, it breaks my heart as all these materialistic/looks-oriented suddenly start “caring” about me.

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    • April 12, 2012 at 10:58 am

      @ Eating as a Path to Yoga, According to Bulik, in order to separate your self-esteem from your body esteem, it’s important to recognize and challenge your inner dialogue (i.e., how you talk to yourself) and to recognize how society also conflates the two. She addresses “intervention” in part two of the book. That’s where the chapter on “fat talk” appears. In this second half, she talks about how readers can spot negative self-talk (and where you’ll find positive thoughts; in doing things like gardening, volunteering, walking, yoga) and identify their own triggers for sparking these thoughts.

      And she includes activities/worksheets on how to do all these things. You can download various worksheets here: http://womaninthemirrorbook.com/worksheets/ I hope that helps!

      Unfortunately, right now, our society praises people for being thin and often stigmatizes, ignores or criticizes those who aren’t. It’s horrible. And it’s unacceptable. I think the key to remember is that the people who truly matter will love and appreciate you regardless of your shape or size. I’ve realized that I can’t look or be what others want me to be. And I refuse to engage in unhealthy habits or be miserable to get there. Instead, I’ve promised myself that I’m going to take good care of myself. Everyone deserves to do that. Attention is fleeting and that “care” that we get when we’ve lost weight is fake anyway. If those people didn’t care before when you’re a certain size, then they don’t count, because they’ve shown their true colors. Care and love ought to be unconditional. You know?

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      • April 15, 2012 at 9:12 am

        This was a great series of articles…I also want to say to Jill (Eating As A Path To Yoga) that I can relate to the feeling that when I am heavier, people are ignoring me and that very well may be true, but one thing I know for sure is that when I don’t feel good about myself, I project those feelings onto others and make assumptions about how they perceive me. It really does start within us…and how others feel about us is none of our business, the only thing that matters is how we feel about ourselves.

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