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31 More Questions to Help You Know Yourself

Last week, I published a piece with 15 questions we can ask ourselves to spark self-reflection, to dig deeper, and to really get to know ourselves. It seemed to resonate with readers, so today, I’m sharing a list of additional questions.

After all, if we don’t know our needs, wants, and wishes, if we don’t understand our intentions and motives, if we’re unsure about what’s swimming inside our souls, how can we honor ourselves? How can we meet our needs? How can we respect our natural tendencies?

Which is why it’s important to take a few moments to check in with ourselves and to listen, with patience, understanding, curiosity, and openness. These questions might help you get started:

  1. What do you find yourself doing every day that you actually don’t want to be doing?
  2. When you take a few minutes to think about it, what are you yearning for?
  3. How can you make that happen today, even in a tiny way?
  4. What are you afraid to tell someone?
  5. When was the last time you laughed?
  6. How can you create more laughter in your life?
  7. What do you think about when you scroll social media, or when you look at specific accounts?
  8. What did you learn about yourself today? Last week?
  9. How would you care for yourself if you accepted yourself as you right now?
  10. What are your favorite things? What do you think they reveal about you?
  11. What do you see when you look into your own eyes?
  12. What empowers you?
  13. What do you think of when you look up at the sky?
  14. What simple pleasures make you smile?
  15. What if you stopped holding on so tightly?
  16. What do you pray for at night (sometimes without even realizing it)?
  17. What does self-care mean to you?
  18. What’s your favorite mistake?
  19. What do you find yourself doing when sadness, anger, anxiety, or some other uncomfortable emotion starts to arise?
  20. What do you forgive in others but can’t forgive in yourself? Do you know why?
  21. How do you define joy?
  22. What does an ideal morning and evening look like for you?
  23. How can you make a small version of this happen this week?
  24. What do you really want to do but you’re too overwhelmed or riddled with doubt to start?
  25. What are you grieving?
  26. When you stop going and going, and actually aren’t doing anything, what thoughts pop up?
  27. What if you let yourself cry?
  28. Why did you do _________?
  29. What do you want to learn more about….about yourself, about life?
  30. What adventures do you want to take?
  31. Before making a decision, reacting to something, or internalizing a thought, consider, does this feed your healing or your suffering?

As you go about your day, as you check off tasks from your to-do list, as you respond to email, as you put the dishes away, remind yourself to pause and to reflect. Remind yourself to go inward, even for a moment or two, and consider a question you’d really like to know the answer to. And then maybe let that answer guide your next steps.

Photo by Lisa Verena Pape on Unsplash

31 More Questions to Help You Know Yourself

Margarita Tartakovsky, MS

Margarita is an associate editor at She writes about everything from taking compassionate care of yourself at any weight, shape, and size, to coping healthfully with difficult emotions. Her goal is to give readers practical, empowering tips to better their lives, and to remind you that whatever you're struggling with, you're never, ever alone.

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APA Reference
Tartakovsky, M. (2019). 31 More Questions to Help You Know Yourself. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 1, 2020, from


Last updated: 15 Apr 2019
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