When you have a mental illness things can get in the way of hanging out with people. Whether it’s depression or anxiety or a ferocious grasp on stability or even the fact that the word ‘schizophrenia’ can scare a lot of people away, friends tend to fall by the wayside if you don’t make an effort to hang out with them.
I guess that’s true for life in general as well. Friendships fade, life gets in the way and things happen that change you into a person that no longer has a lot in common with these groups of people from your past.
The reason I’m reflecting on this today is that I went to a friend’s wedding last night and all my old friends were there. It was nice, I found that, although years had passed we still were able to shoot the breeze and hang out and have fun and it was something that I sorely, desperately needed.
Things have been a little weird lately as anyone who reads this blog regularly has probably been able to tell so an evening of letting my hair down helped me relax.
Despite the hangover, I feel better today than I have in a while and I think that’s because I finally felt included in a group of people that, though I haven’t seen in a while, still remain great, funny, good people.
It was a good time and I wish times like these came around more often.
The point of all this is to say that reconnecting with old friends can only be a good thing, especially if you feel like you’re in a bit of a funk.
Sure we all have facebook but it’s so one dimensional, it’s so surface level that to maintain an actual true friendship through just that is a difficult thing to do. On facebook we only see occasional updates about old friends lives and it’s not nearly enough to sustain a good friendship.
It’s true that people change, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I’m nowhere close to the kid I was in high school when I’d see these people everyday but throughout the years, there’s something that sticks, it might be nostalgia, it might be familiarity or it may be something else but when you reconnect with people you haven’t seen in years all the good feelings you once felt with people seem to bubble up.
I think it’s safe to say that it’s a good thing to do every now and again, to see people that have moved on and created lives of their own and to reflect on the past.
Schizophrenia has made it hard for me to be close with a lot of people so revisiting closeness with people I had before the illness always has seemed easier and it just seems to come so naturally.
I left last night making promises that we’d hang out more often and while that may not actually happen I know that somewhere down the line, we’ll reconnect again, maybe at a time when I need to feel like things could be better.
It sure helped last night.