Today I love hard decisions, the ones that are made decisively and firmly with no going back, decisions that are determined in their nature. I love that I decided some time ago that I would enjoy what life I am given to the best of my ability and it has made a grand difference in how good my life is in my opinion, which is the opinion that counts. I love that there is nothing selfish about only respecting my own opinion when it comes to whether or not my life is good, that the selfish part would be ignoring the good in my life in order to have a bad opinion of it, and I’ve left that so far behind that even parts of my life that weren’t good now appear to be good in the rear view mirror that displays hindsight. I love the decisions that are hard to make but get made anyway and then those decisions are stuck to doggedly because they were so hard won. I love that some of those decisions in my life have been monumental, like when I quit drinking after years of drinking to excess every day of my life. I love that the decision was made possible by my realization that I could either drink constantly or not at all, but I was never meant to be a social, part time drinker, an amazing revelation for the mind of a drunk to come up with on its own.
Today I love that the cooking continues and I love that I often have several meals on the go all at once. I love that there are leftovers and yet there is more food being prepared. I love how good food can be when one is invested in its creation. I love that recently I’ve been reading more and that has helped me relax a great deal. I love that I am still confident that I will get more work done on the changes in our house soon, love that I have been busy with other things that are just as important, love that I’m feeling okay about the pace slowing down for a little while and love that I’m looking forward to finishing this job before it becomes a year old because even with a pandemic in the middle of it all one year is just way too long for something like this to drag on. I love that we started these changes to our home though and still love everything we’ve done so far and intent to love the completed project even more.
Today I love peaches in the porridge. I love the aroma of saffron in the paella fondo. I love that there is a big plan to make a frittata for the weekend and also another rhubarb pie. I love how my mind often veers toward food when I talk of love.
Today I love drinking coffee and listening to the neighborhood noises drift in through the window while I get ready to fire up all the burners under the paella pan.