Archives for August, 2011

General

How To Deal With An Emotional Terrorist

We all have met her (Yes, it could be a him as well.)

She's stormy. We might attribute it to her artistic nature (whether or not she's the "creative type"). But she attributes her storminess, aka angry outbursts, to everything and everyone else. You see, you are responsible for her outbursts, tantrums, complaints and upsets.

Because you have something she needs or wants—a contact, a job lead, a network, a recipe, a vacation home—at some point, she'll...
Continue Reading

General

A Powerful Storm And Personal Power

So Hurricane Irene wasn't the monster storm they warned us about here in NYC, but still, the damage was significant and sadly 26 people lost their lives.

I have some sympathy for the officials who made the decision to evacuate people—if they didn't, and the storm was as catastrophic as its early development indicated it might be, it would have been disastrous (it actually was disastrous in areas, but thank God, we were spared...
Continue Reading

General

Teens and Mind-Heart Therapy

There are two basic tools (they're also processes) we employ to understand what our serious issues and problems are in life. These two tools are the mind and the heart.

The use of both is necessary for real, personal change.

There's intellectual, mind-based acceptance. A simple example might be someone who is abusing prescription painkillers who gets to the point where they are able to say "I know I'm abusing drugs and this is a problem for...
Continue Reading

General

Parents, Teens In Therapy: Communication Breakdown

Let's talk more about the importance of the therapist's note-taking in family therapy with parents and adolescents (it is equally as important in individual therapy, for some related reasons). Without it, therapy is usually a wash. What I said in a recent post on parents and teens in therapy:
The therapist’s notes should be very detailed because many times people mis-hear, mis-communicate or mis-understand what is being said. If the therapist...
Continue Reading

General

Are You All Tweeted Out? Take Our Poll.

There is such a thing as Twitter™ fatigue, or at least "social media" fatigue according to a UK study. Apparently, 25 percent (that's quite a lot!) of 18-29 year old men and women in this study say their use of Twitter™, Facebook™, and YouTube™ has gone done quite a bit.

Me, well I'm no longer in the 18-29 year old group. And, I've always been in agreement with this article which questions whether we...
Continue Reading

General

Parents, Teens In Therapy: Treatment Plans And Transparency

Recently I was interviewed for a study and the subject of adolescents and families in therapy was central to the interview. Also, I've been doing a lot of clinical training and the topic of the best ways to do family therapy, especially with adolescents, repeatedly comes up. It seems like a good time to share some of my thoughts about adolescents and their parents, in therapy.

When adolescents come into therapy for emotional issues and/or substance-abuse...
Continue Reading

General

How To Take A Free Vacation

Each year around this time we're reminded by the media that taking a vacation is good for us (as if we don't already know that). Travel and tourism companies, such as Expedia in this article, release statistics and other advertising-like information to convince us that booking a vacation is essential to our our emotional well-being.

Who can blame them? With the economic outlook appearing to be bleaker than any time since the Great Depression...
Continue Reading

Communication

The Perfect Harmony Of Compassion

One of the most valuable insights I've gained from my from faith's teachings, is to not hold a grudge* (against others, against situations, and against God),  and how to avoid the accompanying and self-defeating bitterness. Not only has this made me a better person, I feel that this has given me an added dimension as a therapist (and also has made me a better teacher and trainer).

But therapy often requires that we talk...
Continue Reading

General

God And My Weight Loss

A. The Way We Eat Now

Are we spoiled for choice? Here are some questions I've asked myself. You might want to do the same:

1. How many times a day do I eat or drink something. No, really.

2. How many times a day do I eat merely to satisfy hunger (or drink to satisfy thirst)?

3. How many times a day do I insist on satisfying a craving for a particular food item?

4. How many times a...
Continue Reading

General

Mr. Smashed Goes To Washington

Richard is taking some time to address his backlog of work, so in the meantime, shares some of her thoughts about drinking and

As reported by the Washington Examiner, SAMHSA (the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) has released research that shows that the alcohol- abuse rates are higher in Washington, than anywhere else in the country.

And it may not be "the street" that's spiking those numbers.

While ...
Continue Reading