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Marriage

Pandemic Woes: Why Single People Are More Likely to Go Hungry

Even before the nationwide lockdowns, there were far too many people in the U.S. with not enough to eat. The pandemic has exacerbated that disturbing reality. More single than married people are suffering. Single people typically have far less money than married people, for a variety of reasons included discriminatory practices written into the laws of the land. But the big financial disadvantage of unmarried Americans is not the only reason they are more likely to go hungry.



Love & Affection

At Heart, He Is a Solo Bird

[Bella’s intro: Because writings about single life are so often dominated by stories by and about single women, I am always looking for men’s perspectives (and from people who do not identify as either). I especially like this one by Daz Pearce, because it comes with an important moral: Sometimes, when none of your romantic relationships last, it is not because you have “issues,” but because, deep down inside, you really want to be single. And for good reasons – it is the best life for you. I call people who live their best, most authentic, and most meaningful lives by being single “single at heart.” Daz calls himself a “solo bird.” I like that, too.]



How we live now

Invited to a Baby Shower? What If You Just Aren’t into That?

[Bella’s intro: Maxine Trump (no relation) has thought a lot about the choice of whether or not to have kids. In fact, she directed a new film about it, To Kid or Not to Kid, that challenges all those obnoxious and insulting stereotypes of people who do not want kids. I haven’t seen it yet, but it is getting great reviews. In this guest post, she wonders how to be supportive to a friend who is having a baby, when there are plenty of good reasons to question whether baby showers are such a great idea.]



Media

If Only #ListenToBlackWomen Were More Than a Hashtag…: Guest Post by Keturah Kendrick

[Bella’s intro: Keturah Kendrick is the author of a book I love, No Thanks: Black, Female, and Living in the Martyr-Free Zone. It is an inspired and unapologetic take on single life and much more, and I’ve discussed what I appreciate about it here, here, and here. Typically, I invite guest bloggers to write about single life, but because of this historic moment, I welcomed Kendrick to write about anything that moved her. I am grateful to her for this powerful essay.]



Love & Affection

Single Men and Single Women: The Double Standard

Ask if there is a double standard for single men compared to single women and the first thing many people come up with is the terminology. Single men are bachelors. Not bad. Sounds like they are free; they can live expansive lives. Single women are spinsters, or at one point, “old maids” (among many other derogatory terms). True, many have tried to reclaim the term spinster, the way the LGBTQ+ community rebranded “queer,” but it is still a work in progress.