Does your teen get bored? I think boredom is the scourge of our time, (along with traffic and fake news!). But on Thanksgiving, surrounded by family and friends, why would your teen be in the basement alone? What the heck is he doing?
A. He might be texting or sexting or snapping or IGing his friends, taking and posting random pictures if himself sticking his tongue out.
B. He might be playing call of duty, a violent video game.
C. He might be moving little tetras- like blocks around on his phone, using up all your data.
D. He might be so bored of religion and politics that he withdrew, becoming anxious and depressed.
What should you do?
1.Tell your teen to bring a book/podcast/audio book or mildly educational item for the car ride.
2. Include teens in your fascinating table talk by inviting their opinions. Do not then talk over them.
3. Do not preach or embarrass or humiliate them with tales of their teenager-ness (eg. Remember when Rob crashed the car, haha!).
4. Do not be arrogant about your opinions. You can learn from them too. Be open-minded.
5. Do not comment on their appearance like, gee purple hair suits you or you really lost weight! Or what’s with the grungy beard?
And finally, do not take it personally if they lash out at you under all the pressure of having to act their age. The more you react the more reactive they get. Stand firm in yourself. Don’t make it about you. You had your chance to act like a baby. Be a parent. Set limits and move on.
- According to recent reports loneliness is at the top of the list for teen and young adult risk factors. “Loneliness is part of the transition to college for just about everyone, but it’s not an easy experience to weather, and many students feel uncomfortable sharing their feelings. It also can get mixed in with homesickness, anxiety, a false sense of inadequacy and depression.” Sep 22, 2016
Maybe you can even agree on some music for the car. Bob Dylan comes to mind… Enjoy the ride!