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Smartphones Bring Phone Sex To A New Level – And It Ain’t How Your Daddy Did It

Until just recently, 1988 – 1998 could have been called The Golden Age of Phone Sex. Way back then (granny would remember), these mostly male callers would spend all the way from two-minutes to two-days lingering at home or in the office, paying to talk, talk, talk about life, love and most of all, S-E-X. Back in those pre-chat room, pre-porn site, pre-web cam and most of all pre-cell phone days, pay for play…talk dirty by-the-$1.98-minute was all the rage.

In an age where safe sex reigned supreme with no HIV treatment yet on the horizon, these steamy, sterile copper-wire connections were the fastest way to get off and get on with your day –no mess no fuss and undeniably safe. The back stories in those days were about the millions being made by those investors savvy enough to snap up and market phone numbers like 1-800-hot-4Sex or 1-800-ALL-GIRL. And don’t forget about those 68 year-old grandmas and 220 lb. stay-at-home moms making extra doe on the side playing the part of the lonely, understanding 24 year-old hot “girl next door.”

Ahh, the good old days… sadly, those with sex addiction and intimacy-related problems were then spending countless hours and thousands of dollars a month to maintain their obsessive “tele-sex” habits, paying off the huge bills at months-end, only to rack up even more debt in the following days and weeks on another credit card or phone bill. Hours spent on the phone with anonymous strangers was time not spent in recreation or with family and the losses for some were great.

Fast-forward to 2011 where we have now entered The Second Golden Age of Phone Sex. Today in our G4-wifi-mobile world, phonesex is faster, fully visual, often free and even more addictive. With smartphones equipped with location-based technology, GPS, and apps like Ashley Madison and Grindr, finding a nearby sex partner in-vivo is as easy and anonymous – equivalent to looking for a good Italian restaurant.

Within 25 seconds of poking the app (for real) you can find whoever you want, where ever you are, with potential hook-ups conveniently listed by closest geo-location…thank you very much. And let us not forget live video streaming; now available on your smartphone of choice, that allows real-time mutual video chat on your phone, great for long-distance relationships and viewing the grandkids, not so great for marital fidelity, the inevitable increase in live video-chat prostitution and those who struggle with sexual and romantic addictions.

What does this all mean? In essence, not a lot for those stable, healthy folks who can pass on the extra piece of cake and skip the fries when they want to. But for those with a propensity for impulsive and addictive pleasure-seeking, we are likely to see a whole new world of problems… all over again.

Stay tuned for more news and views about sex, intimacy, infidelity, and romance in our tech-savvy, digitally enhanced age.

Follow Robert on Twitter @RobWeissMSW

Smartphones Bring Phone Sex To A New Level – And It Ain’t How Your Daddy Did It


Robert Weiss PhD, LCSW

Robert Weiss PhD, LCSW is Chief Clinical Officer of Seeking Integrity Treatment Centers. He is an expert in the treatment of adult intimacy disorders and related addictions, most notably sex/porn/relationship addictions along with co-occurring drug/sex addiction. A clinical sexologist and practicing psychotherapist, Dr. Rob frequently serves as a subject matter expert for major media outlets including CNN, HLN, MSNBC, OWN, The New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, and NPR, among others.Dr. Rob is the author of Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency, Out of the Doghouse, Sex Addiction 101, and Cruise Control, among other books. He blogs regularly for Psychology Today and Psych Central. His podcast, Sex, Love, & Addiction, is rated as a Top 10 Addiction Podcast for 2019. He also hosts a weekly live no-cost Webinar with Q&A on SexandRelationshipHealing.com. A skilled clinical educator, Dr. Rob routinely provides training to therapists, hospitals, psychiatric organizations, and even the US military. Over the years, he has created and overseen nearly a dozen high-end addiction and mental health treatment facilities across the globe. For more information or to reach Dr. Rob, visit SeekingIntegrity.com. You can also follow him on Twitter (@RobWeissMSW), LinkedIn (Robert Weiss LCSW), and Facebook (Rob Weiss MSW).


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APA Reference
Weiss PhD, R. (2020). Smartphones Bring Phone Sex To A New Level – And It Ain’t How Your Daddy Did It. Psych Central. Retrieved on July 8, 2020, from https://blogs.psychcentral.com/sex/2011/04/smartphones-bring-phonesex-to-a-new-level-and-it-ain%e2%80%99t-how-your-daddy-did-it/

 

Last updated: 11 May 2020
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