Addictions

One Layer Deeper: Dating in Recovery

A few weeks ago, I ran into a couple of colleagues, Jonathon Taylor and Jackie Pack, at a conference for therapists, and they told me about a series of weekend healthy dating workshops they were planning for recovering addicts and former partners of recovering addicts. I was immediately intrigued, knowing how difficult it is for most of my clients, especially those affected by sex and porn addiction/compulsivity, to enter or re-enter the dating pool.

Taylor and Pack...


Addictions

It’s Official: Compulsive Sexual Behavior (Sex Addiction) Gets a Diagnosis


At some point in 2018, the World Health Organization will release the latest version of its International Classification of Diseases (the ICD-11). Rumors suggest the book will publish over the summer, but the WHO’s official statement only says, “the final ICD-11 will be released in 2018.” Thus, it could be any time between now and the end of the year.

If you’re unfamiliar with the ICD and its importance, I’ll simply say that it’s the...


Addictions

Addiction Is an Intimacy Disorder


Addiction and Early-Life Trauma

Addicts are people who’ve lost control over their relationship with a substance or behavior. They use when they don’t want to. They use when they have promised themselves and others they will stop. They use when it pushes them away from family, friends, and other important people. They use when it impacts their work, schooling, finances, reputation, freedom, etc. They tell egregious lies to themselves and others to rationalize and justify their actions. They...


Addictions

When Online Sex Sparks Meth Addiction…

A few months ago I had the pleasure of speaking at a Meth and Sex Addiction public forum in Palm Springs, CA. The three-person panel—myself, David Fawcett, and Terry Gatewood—spoke to an attentive and participatory audience of around 100 addicts and clinicians about the...


Hypersexual Disorders

Five FACTS About Porn

Today, digital pornography is a hot topic. Very hot.

Beliefs and opinions about porn’s availability, use, and effects abound, but facts are relatively scarce. There are pro-porn factions who think porn is great for sex and relationships; the more the better. At the same time,...


Addictions

Working with Partners of Sex Addicts: An Interview with Dr. Barbara Steffens

My friend and colleague, Dr. Barbara Steffens, has specialized in the treatment and coaching of sex addicts and the betrayed partners of sex addicts since 1999. During that time, she has conducted groundbreaking research on the trauma that betrayed partners experience, and she has written an excellent (and highly recommended) book on the topic, Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal. Dr. Steffens is also a founding member and current President of APSATS: The Association of Partners and...


Addictions

Debunking Myths About Sexual Addiction




At the age of 20, Steven came out as gay to his highly religious parents. As members of a very conservative sect, they struggled to accept his “choice” as “normal,” and they decided to seek advice from their pastor. Unfortunately, their pastor, a trained and licensed pastoral counselor, suggested “sex addiction treatment” with another therapist in their religious community. In this treatment, Steven was given a variety of highly homophobic tasks to complete—participating in...


Addictions

Keeping Your Addicted Clients Focused in the New Year

As any therapist knows, the beginning of the year is when a lot of new clients show up, and when a lot of old clients decide to get serious about the work they’ve been doing. They seem to view the new year as a great time for a fresh start. This is especially true with addicts. Unfortunately, an addicted client’s enthusiasm for recovery can wane as quickly as our own resolutions to go to the gym...


Page 1 of 22123...Last »