The Role of Empathy in Healing from Sex Addiction: An Interview with Carol Juergensen Sheets

I have known Carol Juergensen Sheets, aka Carol the Coach, for quite some time, having appeared on her Sex Addiction podcast, as well as her Betrayal Trauma podcast, and having welcomed her as a guest on my own podcast, Sex, Love, and Addiction. Carol is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist and coach who frequently appears on both television and radio discussing sexual addiction and related issues. She is...


Porn in the Family: Filtering/Blocking Software vs. Tracking/Monitoring Software

As I wrote a few weeks ago in a post to Psychology Today, accessing pornography used to be difficult. Then technology happened. First, we got softcore on cable. Next, we got hardcore on VHS tapes rented from the local video store. Then we got the internet. Suddenly, pretty much anyone who wanted to look at porn could do so – anytime, anywhere, free of charge. In today’s world, we’ve got porn sites with images and videos of every ilk imaginable,...

American Psychological Association

The Answer to Misogyny Is Coming Soon … To a Psychology Office Near You

In January of this year, the American Psychological Association (APA) released a set of guidelines for the treatment of boys and men. In doing so, the organization appeared to offer a timely, direct response to the #MeToo movement and our culture’s recent examination of “toxic masculinity.” But even when putting #Metoo aside, the creation of standards and ethical boundaries around clinical men’s work was and is in fact much-needed. You see, for years now we’ve had such guidelines for clinical work...


Lots of People Like a Little Kink

How Common are Kinks, Fetishes, and Paraphilic Disorders?

According to a recent study, paraphilic attractions (kinks and fetishes) are more common than most people might think. The study surveyed 387 adult males about the presence and impact of paraphilic attractions and behaviors in their lives, with the following results:

of survey participants reported some degree of paraphilic arousal.
said paraphilic arousal was most frequent while fantasizing.
used paraphilic arousal during masturbatory fantasies.
said they’d engaged in some form of...

Hypersexual Disorders

Six Reasons People Quit Using Porn

Let me begin this post by stating that I am neither anti-porn nor pro-porn. As a sexologist and addiction treatment specialist, it is not in my job description to judge any mutually consensual sexual behavior, including the appearance in and/or use of pornography. I...

Hypersexual Disorders

Treating Different Categories of Sex/Porn Addicts

In my previous post to this site, I discussed the difference between traditional, trauma-driven sex/porn addicts and a new and rapidly growing subcategory of sex/porn addicts that I refer to as digital-age/conditioned porn addicts. The primary difference between the categories is one group is trauma-based, as we traditionally see with addictions in general, while the other is not. Typically, digital-age/conditioned porn addicts are individuals who start using porn at a young age (often before puberty hits). Over time, they get used to...