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Abandonment Fears of a Vulnerable Narcissist: BPD at the Core


When I look at narcissism through the vulnerability lens, I see the shame-based fear of being ordinary. I see the fear of never feeling extraordinary enough to be noticed, to be lovable, to belong, or to cultivate a sense of purpose.” Brene Brown
We, in the mental health field, who work with survivors of psychological abuse generally are versed in the subtle nuances of personality disorders. As a strengths-focused therapist, I have always been loathe to assign labels to human beings. However, as relates to healing in the aftermath of psychological abuse, my clients often find relief in understanding the specific type of abuse they have sustained. In many circumstances, the clients I work with have been impacted by narcissistic abuse, whether in family, romance or work settings. Psycho-education empowers my clients to heal, as they work through cognitive dissonance after experiencing a multitude of emotional abuse tactics by their abuser (Louis de Canonville, 2017).

6 Comments to
Abandonment Fears of a Vulnerable Narcissist: BPD at the Core

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  1. Narcissism can be also viewed as a disease. There are narcissists employers out here who think it’s all about them and that some of their employees are yes men. A narcissist employer doesn’t see anything he or she does wrong, and continually put down others either directly to their faces or in secret. These types of narcissists employers have a lot to hide and skeletons in their closets.

    Narcissists employers can possibly be a blessing in disguise when they push the wrong person mentally. They test the wrong person with their narcissistic attitude and inspire the employee they’re targeting to not only start their own business, but to be well on the journey to becoming a future millionaire. While all narcissists are possibly arrogant and self-centered, they end up being a footstool in the end and used as a stepping stone for greatness, without return on their narcissistic investment.

    • yes, toxic people can be found in the workplace, in families, and in romantic and friendship relationships. That’s whey we need psychological abuse awareness going on out there….

      • I agree with you Andrea. 🙂

      • thank you 🙂

  2. At first glance at the title, I thought it implied people with NPD have BPD, but I do think when BPD and NPD traits are found in one person, the tie is DEFINITELY vulnerability, shame, and fear of abandonment. Great read!

    • Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks!

 

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