15 thoughts on “12 Signs You Are Falling Out of Love with Your Partner

  • August 15, 2016 at 11:53 pm

    A wise man once said: “The problem is with PERCEPTION. Couples misperceive each other – they assume the other is being mean, or is trying to hurt them, or is ignoring their needs. THAT is the REAL problem. Correct that and the marriage has a chance.”

    http://www.oludara.info/

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    • August 16, 2016 at 12:00 am

      Wise indeed! I may have to borrow it.

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      • August 17, 2016 at 2:31 pm

        Indeed. Advertisers, psychologists (etc.) and wise people know that “Perception is reality”.

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    • August 18, 2016 at 3:13 am

      Great post, ptw632! I understand what you are talking about and can see how that behavior could destroy a marriage – at any stage!

      It was no secret when I got together with my husband 16 years ago, he had a healthy sense of humor, but often times I was sensitive and when he’d say something, almost anything at all, I would “misperceive” what he was really trying to say to me. I thought what he had said was disparaging, cruel and careless. That wasn’t the case – I was making it all up in my head! I should say, rather, my imagination was running ahead of me and it was giving me a run for my money that’s for sure.

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  • August 17, 2016 at 4:53 pm

    Thank you for article. I am holding on to my partner hoping he will laugh with me like he does now with mates. Choose to spend time with me and talk about important or fun stuff. Instead he does other things without me. I don’t rely on him for money, a home or children.I don’t consider myself as a person who places unreal expectations on relationship. We had love. But I am feeling like an inconvenience to his life after two years. My thoughts are cosidered nagging but I am trying to fix what is broken. If I keep my mouth shut, cook meals and share his bed he gives me time but not words. I have realised now I am lost in trying to hold on to him. Why is it so hard to walk away? Why do I love him so much? Am I holding on to our past when we laughed and talked together and even argued? I miss that.

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    • August 17, 2016 at 5:21 pm

      Hello,
      Thank you for responding to the article. In my opinion remaining silent about something that is obviously causing you distress is not the answer. Feelings are neither right or wrong, they just are what they are. As you mentioned in your response you just keep your mouth shut, ensuring your partners needs are being addressed. My question is, what about your needs? In order to be truly satisfied in a relationship a give and take must exist. To answer your other question, it is difficult to walk away from a partner because we tend to gravitate towards the familiar. There is comfort in being with someone we know, know what to expect, doing the things we have always done, etc. Venturing out into foreign territory can be very scary and confusing. It is not uncommon to become uncomfortable with the prospect of facing what is unfamiliar and unknown to us, as a lot of us store our fear there. That being said when you do not acknowledge or talk about the changes in your relationship you will not be able to get to the root cause of your problems. By looking in the review mirror of your past you will not be able to successfully move forward. I suggest you seek relationship counseling to address some of the problems and concerns in your relationship. I think this will help because you have already tried to do so on your own without success.

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      • August 18, 2016 at 6:12 am

        Thank you for your reply. I have suggested counselling to my partner. He is thinking about it. For myself, you have given me perspective. Which I very much appreciate.

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  • February 9, 2017 at 5:49 am

    This article reaffirms a lot of my feelings, the fact that I’m looking up signs about a possible failure in my relationship. As most things it started off good and we were happy for about a year and a half. Situations happened with his kid and mine, young adults, and they moved out. Then issues with his job and health began to happen adding further stress. Long story short we never got back to where we started. I have addressed the distance the rejection and the reasons he gave hurt my feelings… so I shut down. At almost 4 years in we’re like roommates. No physical intimacy period.. at one time I felt like I was the only one fighting for us and he didn’t try to remedy our issues. Now I’m to the point where I’m ready to call it quits

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  • September 7, 2017 at 3:05 pm

    I am so sad to say these are all the signs he gives me ,but soon as i try to disconnect he texts or call. Claims he still love me i feel so empty hurt abandoned. He is mean and resentful. I dont know how to let go. I keep having hope. I know i need to focus on me. I constantly ask him same questions never says what i want to hear.

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  • October 24, 2017 at 5:16 pm

    Here I am trying to find out what I’m actually feeling…. searching for “signs you’re galling out of love”. It makes me sick to my stomach, but we have serious unresolved issues.
    We met over 6 years ago, both in the midst of ending our failing 26 year marriages. We both had weddings the same year.
    We fell head over heels. He moved away from his children to be with me, first living separately, more recently together. For over 3 years he had been saying we were getting married ‘soon’. It hasn’t happened. I’ve asked him why, but he gives excuses and I drop it. We’ve had issues with our grown children. My daughter lives at home again and that has thrown a wrench into our plans to sell my marital home and move together. She’s been hostile to us and it’s a negative environment.
    Still, no talk of marriage. I guess I should get a clue by now, and internalizing all this anger about his broken promises has affected my feelings toward him.
    I don’t really want a forced marriage from an ultimatum, but neither do I want to be strung along. I want and deserve to know his intentions.
    I’m hurting so badly.

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  • May 14, 2018 at 11:11 am

    I enjoyed this article. I believe my husband is no longer interested in me, he is not in love with me anymore, It bothers me to the point that I can’t sleep at night that he lusts after women when we are out together. Recently we attended his nephew college graduation in South Carolina. He couldn’t take his eyes off other women as usual. This behavior makes me feel so unwanted and undesirable to him, like I’m not enough. We sit in this house and watch tv every weekend, I think he is ashamed to be seen with me. He sat far away from me at the graduation. I’m tired of feeling like this I don’t know what to do.

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    • May 14, 2018 at 11:50 am

      Hi Octavia,
      Have you discussed your feelings with your husband? As human beings there will be times that we may look at another person with appreciation, however, that does not mean we love our partners any less. If this staring is for extended periods of time and feels inappropriate you may want to discuss this with your husband, e.g., how it makes you feel when he does this. I am also concerns about what appears to be lack of communication by “watching tv all weekend” when that time could be spent truly building intimacy and communication. That fact that your husband sits far away from you is also telling as this suggestions he has also distanced himself from you emotionally. It seems to me that you and your husband would benefit from going to marriage counseling. If you would like to improve your relationship with your husband I would seek counseling sooner rather than later.
      Best of luck.

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  • July 3, 2018 at 9:16 am

    I have fallen out of love with my husband. He is a very jealous person. I have been caught sexting, so which I guess he has the right to be. He throws it in my face every single minute and I am not allowed to go out with friends etc because he always thinks I am cheating. I stay because we have two kids. I do not want to be selfish for them. Believe it or not we do not fight and act like everything is ok. I do not hate him. I just don’t love him. I asked him why does he always want to know where I am at. He stated because he doe snot want to loose me. He does love me with all of his heart and treats me like a princess. I just do not have the same feelings back. So of course, I am cheating without him knowing it and we meet up. I act like everything at home is ok. Any advise?? I want to be fair for the kids also.

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    • July 3, 2018 at 9:58 am

      Hello Amanda,

      My advice to you is to be both open and honest with yourself about what you need to be happy. You have fallen out of love with your husband, but you do not love him in the same way he loves you. I know you want to stay in the marriage because of the children, however, children learn how to give and receive love to others from their parents or guardians. You want your children to see what a loving give and take relationship looks like. You do not want your children to simply settle for anything less than true love. You are also being unfaithful in your marriage which is unfair to your husband. Your husband deserves all of you, not part of you. You mentioned you are “cheating without him knowing it”, however, you also stated your husband “always thinks you are cheating”. Those statements appear to contradict your belief that your husband is unaware of what is going on in your marriage. Your husband may suspect you are cheating but is unable to prove it. Do yourself and your husband a good deed by being honest about your marriage, what you are lacking in the marriage, and what you are looking for in a relationship. You may be able to salvage the marriage or move on from the marriage with both dignity and respect. By leaving a marriage with as little hurt feelings as possible you limit the likelihood of negatively impacting your children. Good Luck!

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  • January 20, 2019 at 11:05 am

    I have been in my realtionship for over 2 years and the other day it clicks like my feelings have changed , he is a narcissist and he verbally abused me so bad that I didn’t even cry we we’re in front of people , then the next day I love you so much you always make me feel like this.i woke up the next morning with no feelings for him , out of love , no more trying exusted what is the best thing I’m trying to leave , but don’t know how I don’t love him anymore I don’t trust him anymore I don’t have an emotional connection , the intamacy is non connection it doesn’t feel as one.

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