4 thoughts on “Research Finds That Narcissists Try To Remain Friends With Their Exes For Darker Reasons

  • August 29, 2018 at 7:40 am

    Shahida, I like how you put this, ( Darker Reasons ) I’ll be pulling this out, in the future, next time I get hovered, and rereading. Nice job of getting all the points across quickly.

    (they simply miss having control over you, access to your various resources and the power they wielded in the relationship.)

    (Hoovering has the ability to trigger the trauma bond and unhealed wounds, bringing them to the surface and compelling us to go back to the source of the trauma as a form of comfort.)
    This is what I have most difficultly with, have done the go back multipole times.
    I am finally getting stronger because of post like this.
    thank you

  • December 19, 2019 at 7:37 pm

    Thank you, out of loneliness i Was going to see him for the holidays.. You reminded me that he only one benefiting from the.

  • January 29, 2020 at 11:20 pm

    I fell for the do over hook line and sinker. I tdivorced him 20 years ago. Took many years too understand what I lived. I was too young to be marred he was in his mid 20’s . Red flag was he love bombed me but I was just barely over 16. After I got pregnant, I graduated early to go into my dream military career. well he said the baby was not his. Too this day still says it. He threatens DNA. He is still on one nite sex sites. Drinking gambling and just leaves for days. He convinced me to come back because I am now disabled to keep me out of a home. Well I am too young and in the divorce he hid everything but 20 k in charge card debt., yes I got half of that. He spent on lis other women. It was all about him. He had to have the best of it all. I was kept at the house raising my kids. i lost 3 babies he said he was happy. They would have put him in the poor house. I held my baby as she took her last breathe, he did not want to hold her. Her sister had already passed. My son I did not get to hold. Now he is claiming the youngest child is not his due to the fact he has negative RH blood type. I feel my whole life with that person was a fake life. So true no empathy. They truly only care about their life. He refused to take care of the house, cook the neighbors said in 20 years he cut the grass 3 times. As I type this I am forced to sleep on the living room floor with mice. No he cleans nothing. His room is. Disgusting. Has not showered in 8 days, has not eased his bedding in 10 months.,the house stinks. He drinks in his room as he masterbates with nearby women then meets up with them for the real deal. They have been hear i have found there ratings and pantries. I grabbed his phone the text said from the sex site , I got your profile would you like to hook up friend with benifits he said when and where.? Then he said he could do what ever tire F^*lk he wants and does. I have nowhere to go. i have had thoughts, I live like a caged animal . I can not drive nor work. I am told I am pretty, I loook like I never had 6 kids. But I don’t think I am pretty, I feel ugly, depressed, you see he got in my head again. Masters of deceit. I wish God would get me out. The safe houses are full. I only have the street left. My kids don’t have time for me. Yes, I will still lay down my life for them unconditional love. Maybe they don’t fully understand the situation. 4 concussions because he does not care, he left me alone for days and it was not his fault and I had reniel failure he left me alone for 60 hours never checked on me came and went. Not his fault he was at the bar.Please escape if you can. Waiting for god to help. I have asked many but no one believes a person could be Dr Jekyll Mr Hyde.

    • March 17, 2020 at 8:32 pm

      Hi there,
      I didn’t want to read your comment and just run. Firstly, I believe everything you say. Narcs are scarily accomplished actors and an innate ability to hoodwink others with ease.
      I’m so sorry for this hellish existence you’re still enduring. You know deep down ‘it’ isn’t worthy of breathing the same air as you.
      You’ve probably already exhausted many an option but is there a disability charity you could approach for help? Especially as you have children to raise x


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