5 thoughts on “5 Tests Which Reveal A Narcissist’s True Colors

  • August 1, 2019 at 10:40 am

    All really good tests. Before I ever knew what a Narc was, my boundary was the inability to have any kind of conflict resolution that was kind and productive. Any attempt at this resulted in a Narc rage with name calling, cursing, yelling and sometimes throwing, breaking, slamming and even hitting! This was the ultimate deal killer to me. I could not have a long term relationship with someone that would do this! While I never married this lady, I was with her for 6 years! We even tried counseling but it was hopeless. The last 2 years since breaking up and going no-contact have been the toughest of my life! Accepting the fact that the person you love never really existed is a hard pill to swallow! Just like the recovering alcoholic, I just go day to day knowing I can’t ever take that drink again!

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  • August 1, 2019 at 6:18 pm

    Say “No”

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  • August 2, 2019 at 9:25 am

    I’ve got a feeling I was married to one. Lol he spent money on my photography hobby which was nice but mostly because he wanted to look generous. I was grateful but he never spend time with me trying to get my business up and running and I didn’t have a business head. He did.
    He went to the gym when I was suffering depression and laying on the bed just wanting cuddles,. He made out all my issues were about him when they weren’t and I’d told him that. I had traumatic teenage years and some things bought that back to me. Especially leaving my family after wé married, he had very little empathy, he even once told me that people who committed suicide went to hell and that’s what my mother had done.!! Horrid thing to hear.
    I wanted to learn about finances paying bills and planning holidays but he never let me do that even though I offered He liked being in control of everything and then complained that I wasn’t independent.!!! I didn’t get a job as my confidence was shot to hell. In the end this is one of the reasons he gave for leaving me. He only cared about his image and when I put on weight because I was unhappy, even a short cycle ride was not enough and that’s exactly what he told me when he said it wasn’t worth getting the bike out for a 3 mile ride……but I felt I was trying my best but taking it slowly. Not enough for him.
    He never wanted communication again and his last words after 22 years were that I’d been a good mother to our kids but not a good wife. Lovely man
    I’m glad im out of it now. It’s been 18 years. Happier alone than with him

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  • August 2, 2019 at 10:12 am

    Thank you for a great article! I wonder if you have written or could write something in regards to the COVERT narcissist? My fiance has even acknowledged that he is a covert narcissist and is trying to change and to me this type of narcissist is even more dangerous. I’d love to get your input

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  • August 4, 2019 at 8:32 pm

    Excellent list and great article Shahida.

    I’m sure that you would have noticed many of these features yourself being a young successful attractive educated author. I can only imagine that many female “friends ” would feel envious of your success and your vibrant personality. It’s very painful not to have females who want to celebrate your success. If you have found some then you are very fortunate.

    I’ve experienced quite a bit of female friends who were envious of me over the years and what I have learned is that once we become aware of competition and envy that we almost have to accept that the relationship has a very limited shelf life. Envious “friends” can never truly be a friend. They don’t want you to succeed. And yes….competitiveness ! These people tend to want another persons shine so they can counterfeit it, but they don’t really want the person. They want to be associated with us for all the wrong reasons. Envy wants what someone else has and HATES the person for having it. You can even feel it right over the computer through correspondence or comments.

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