All I Want For Christmas Is A Stable Mood

Christmas tends to be a stressful time.  If you are someone who is particularly sensitive to other people’s stresses then you may find yourself being quick react.

Being reactive is where moods can run away with themselves.  It is all too easy to find yourself spending the rest of the day trying to get your reactions back under your control.  That is a very tiring way to live.

I think it is more helpful to try to be proactive and to manage yourself and to prepare for the different emotions you are likely to encounter.


Living With Borderline Personality Disorder

Being given a diagnosis of a personality disorder can be a shock if you weren’t expecting it, but it can be a relief too.  You may have long felt that there was something wrong with you that wasn’t being recognised.  Now you have the diagnosis you are in a position to plan and look after yourself better.

What does it mean?  What is it?

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is also referred to as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD).


Psychotherapy – A Relationship You Can Understand

Psychotherapy is the one relationship where you have the chance of being clear about what is going on.

Did you grow up feeling you were being kept in the dark?  Were you raised in a difficult family and felt left out of the loop?  When you tried to ask questions about what was going on were you met with silence, anger and denial?    Perhaps you were told you were being difficult, over sensitive, or too demanding for asking questions?

Then you would be left, still in the dark, and probably feeling worse about it.


When Psychotherapy Ends Prematurely

It is a regrettable thing, but a lot of psychotherapy and counselling ends prematurely.  
Sometimes there is a shared sense of regret that the work won’t be going further, a shared sense that a connection has been made which might be important for the client, but which for obscure and perhaps rather unconscious reasons will not be going any further at this time.


How To Live After Trauma

Trauma has a particularly destructive effect on our minds and consciousness.  After trauma we experience problems with time, memory, self, keeping perspective.  In my view we have no choice but to continually try to re-balance our minds and selves. This is something we have to make a commitment to keep working on every day, throughout life.


Repeated Childhood Nightmares

Did you suffer from repeated childhood nightmares?  Have those nightmares become embedded in your memory in a way that other things haven't?

It is often the case when people have been exposed to trauma in childhood that they go onto experience significant problems with memory.  And yet what is interesting is that we tend to remember our repeated nightmares from childhood.


Can You Deal With Depression Without Medication?

In some cases it will be possible to deal with depression without medication.  You need to assess your case carefully.  If you are already on medication, then you will need to plan and review any changes with your GP and psychiatrist and carefully monitor any changes that you make.

Having said that, the evidence from my work is that most, though not all of our psychological and emotional states, relate to our experiences.  So, the clearer we can be about the link between those things the more likely we are to get more control over our moods.  The challenge is in finding a way to see the link between what has happened to us and how we feel.


Are You Recovering From A Narcissistic Parent?

If so, how you can find a way to come to terms with the psychological injuries of the past, and to stop the old toxic experiences from contaminating and spoiling your present life?  How do you recover from an upbringing with a narcissistic parent?

If you were raised by a parent who suffered from


Were You Raised By A Narcissistic Parent?

Narcissistic as a descriptive personality term is often overused and abused, but what does it mean? What are the consequences of growing up with a parent with narcissistic personality problems?

The people we describe as narcissistic often tend to function very well.  Socially they can come across as gifted and charming.  They appear to have much better impulse control than would be found in people who display regressive personality characteristics or more severe borderline personality issues.