Narcissistic as a descriptive personality term is often overused and abused, but what does it mean? What are the consequences of growing up with a parent with narcissistic personality problems? The people we describe as narcissistic often tend to function very well. Socially they can come across as gifted and charming. They appear to have much better impulse control than would be found in people who display regressive personality characteristics or more severe borderline personality issues.
Grooming works by turning an innocent and vulnerable person into a guilty person. It leads to powerful and destructive feelings of shame and self-loathing becoming sealed up inside the abused victim. This sense of guilt and secrecy can create a lasting psychological injury, but this may be improved with care and time.
If you were raised by a narcissistic parent it is likely that your early life will have been marked by extreme unpredictability. You will not have experienced ordinary empathic attunement from your care giver and guardian, and this will have had a consequence in terms of how you have gone on to regulate your emotions, moods and psychology.
If you had a parent who suffered from undiagnosed narcissistic issues you probably grew up in a very disturbing home.
We all have different complexes. In Jungian analysis, consciousness and our experience of ourselves is made up of various complexes. Ignored, a complex has the power to significantly disturb us. When we are in the grip of a complex we are likely to behave irrationally and possibly make bad decisions.
When life suddenly turns anxiousA man in his 30s comes to see me. He is doing well in his career. He is in a relationship that he is optimistic about. He is the last person who would have thought he needed psychotherapy. But over the last few months things have started to change. He has started to become anxious and uncertain. He is sleeping badly and obsessively worrying about things.
1 - Pick a Psychotherapist Who Listens to YouWhen I start working with someone I try to pay very careful attention to what they are telling me about themselves and their situation. I find that a surprising number of conditions, often conditions including quite serious health complaints can be understood and resolved by piecing together the client's story.
Narcissism covers a range of psychological presentations. At one end we might all need a certain narcissistic self-interest to make sure we look after ourselves. It is healthy to have a certain amount of confidence and to speak openly about our achievements. It is healthy to want to look after ourselves. But in certain cases, this can veer towards pathological self-interest and can be a marker of more serious personality disorders.
The fear of being rejectedIn Jordan Peterson's view, men are motivated by being worthy and accepted by women. This says Peterson is one of the origins of chivalry; men use the image of female perfection to better themselves. It is the devotion to women that makes men behave better and improve themselves. In one lecture Peterson takes the figure of Venus manifesting herself in the sky. Peterson thinks that modern women have not understood this about men, that men are trying to make themselves worthy of the women they esteem and desire.
If you grew up in a family in which emotions and relationships were chaotic, it is likely that you will go on to struggle with emotions and relationships. One way of thinking and developing understanding of your situation is to think in terms of whether you have a secure base?