10 thoughts on “5 Unhealthy Relationship Patterns Childhood Trauma Sets for Us

  • August 28, 2018 at 9:50 am

    Yeah that’s a really helpful description, a lot of this feels quite familiar, but what to do next?
    I’m working with a good therapist, but there’s just so much. Between marriage, family relationships, work, and my fluctuating mental health it’s hard to know how to navigate all of this.

    • August 29, 2018 at 6:44 am

      I do agree with the process. But as Glass egg C has mentioned what next?

      Dear Darius please do involve me if you have done research further on the topic.

      Thanks and best wishes.

    • August 29, 2018 at 8:45 am

      I’m right there with you. It’s very overwhelming and so hard to know where to start. I feel like a lost little kid who can’t find her way out of a paper bag.

  • August 28, 2018 at 5:14 pm

    excellent article.
    and so TRUE. was so ucial to really process ….where it all began….for me…
    to really begin my healing.

  • August 28, 2018 at 6:43 pm

    A great read thanks one thing though..in the third point headed ‘Control’ the last sentence describing who they are attracted to as being ‘weaker’ I would say vulnerable or less dominant as the controller is the weak one needing the other person for everything.
    ‘Weaker’ as a description has conotations of inferior, less, under, keeping the person, reading this thinking that they are less. It’s the language of control.
    The under person usually is the strongest as they must placate and put up with the other persons every mood & demand.
    This has been a very helpful read. Thankyou

  • August 29, 2018 at 8:32 am

    Great article. Very insightful. I feel like many of the catagoriges bled into others, and I have quite a few overlapping criteria from both parents. Yes, where do you go from here.
    Broken hearted- JB

  • August 29, 2018 at 10:46 am

    This was very good! It’s helpful to have these different origins summarized. I guess I’m quite “Distrustful” but surprisingly, more than a little bit “Idealizing” (and it’s always helpful to recognize what’s really going on) but very “Dependent.” Yep.

    I just downloaded your “Starter kit,” thanks for that, whatever turns out to be in it 🙂

    I’ve realized that the little burst of hope I feel every time I read something with new light doesn’t mean that previous such bursts were useless. This is a journey, a process, of always discovering new things, taking steps. Not all the steps turn out to be on the right path but they all lead generally upward towards good health. We might not stay as “up” as we had hoped at the beginning of each step, but we just don’t sink back down as far as we were to start with, so it’s all good progress.

    Thank you for helping!

    • September 3, 2018 at 4:03 pm

      Yes. Very insightful. It is a very long journey and there has been a great many let downs, but they are not as down as any before. It’s helpful to know that it really is always up. Thanks for pointing that out.

  • August 29, 2018 at 10:59 am

    Thank you for this article. This fits my childhood and I work everyday to change my adulthood.

  • August 29, 2018 at 4:06 pm

    Start with a small behavior that you can work on preventing. Begin by trying to get in front of the action before you engage in the action. It takes practice to alter knee jerk behavior, but the more you try, the more you will arrive at success. The only behavior is your own. Rome was not built in a day. But you can begin today to change one thing about your behavior.


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