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Archives for Boundaries


Back to School Blues: How Family Matters

A three year longitudinal study confirmed what family therapists have observed clinically for decades--namely that patterns of family interaction have profound effects on children--both for better and for worse. Here's the bottom line: if you want your kids to succeed in school, build a stronger, more loving family.

Melissa Sturge-Apple, a researcher from the University of Rochester, studied 234 families with 6 year-old children, and followed the adjustment of the kids in their first three...
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Selfies, Sharing & Internet Safety: What’s A Parent to Do?

“Please, just tell me what to do about my daughter’s constant use of her cell phone!”

“My son throws a fit every time I tell him to get off the computer. Please help.”

“How many hours a day should I let my kid be on line? Is it safe?”

Everyone working with kids and teens these days is constantly being asked the same questions and lots more. Questions about cyber-bullying and sexting and Internet safety. About...
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Are Your Kids Ruling the Roost? Parenting A Strong-Willed Child

Do you have to raise your voice, lecture or repeat yourself to get your kids to behave?
Do your kids ignore normal, everyday requests when they just don’t feel like listening?
Have you tried to avoid spanking and yelling but nothing else seems to work?
Are you exhausted and upset because your kids seem disrespectful, entitled or ungrateful for all the things you do for them?
 Are you feeling frustrated and defeated despite your best...
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Breaking Free from Your Victim Story

“You can either be a victim of the world or an adventurer in search of treasure. It all depends on how you view your life.” -Paulo Coelho

How often do you say things out loud or to yourself like: "He makes me feel stupid" or "I'm depressed because she is always criticizing me" or "I would be happy if my partner would only treat me better? He/she won't let me do that, think that,...
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Drowning in Love: What’s Too Much of a Good Thing?

Definitions of smothering love: To express your love for someone too much; to cover someone or something completely; to insulate, to overwhelm.

Parenting is one of the hardest jobs around. Especially here, especially now, in our rapidly moving, constantly changing modern world. Most parents seek out this job willingly and joyfully with the best of intentions. Doesn't everyone want to raise happy healthy children who grow up into competent independent adults? Of course. So...
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Honesty Rules: 10 Steps to Get There

If you ask parents to name the most important values that they want to instill in their children, honesty is almost always high on the list. The same is true of qualities that we look for in a mate or close friend. In order to build trust, we need to believe in someone's word. How many times have you asked a loved one, "Please, just tell me the "

If your goal is to build honesty...
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Nipping Narcissism in the Bud

"When science discovers the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to find they are not it." ~Bernard Baily

How Do You Know If Someone Is A Narcissist?

The following adjectives are often used to describe someone with too much narcissism: selfish, arrogant, entitled, show-off, big shot, bossy, self-absorbed, egomaniac, attention grabber, manipulative, high maintenance, proud, vain, above the rules, better than others, full of himself. You know the type. Does anyone you...
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The Age of Enlightenment or the Age of Entitlement?

Fasten your seat belts and prepare for some disturbing trends showing up in America these about what these statistics and stories all have in

Spending More than We Earn

Americans spend trillion dollars on their credit cards each year. Sadly, over 40% are spending more money than they are earning. Studies show that people spend far more money using credit cards than they would spend if they were paying with...
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Healthy, Wealthy & Wise? 5 Myths About Rich Kids

"The love of family and the admiration of friends is much more important than wealth or privilege." -Charles Kuralt

Myth #1: Kids from wealthy families have fewer emotional and behavioral problems.

It is well known from decades of research that children growing up in harsh, dangerous and impoverished neighborhoods are at considerably higher risk for emotional and behavioral problems. What is less well known is that children from well educated, upper middle class families are...
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Sleeping Your Way to Greater Health and Happiness

"A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor's book." ~Irish Proverb
Honestly answer the following questions:
Do you have to set your alarm in order to wake up in the morning?

Do you wake up your kids--before they would get up on their own--to be ready for school or camp?

Do people in your family wake up cranky and out of sorts?

Do you ever fall asleep watching TV, at the movies,...
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