When you think of a narcissist, you think of a more than noticeable personality type.
You may think of people who are so obsessed with themselves that nothing else around them seems to matter at all. When you think of a megalomaniac, you think of someone who is hungry for power/money/sex.
Many narcissists or megalomaniacs are more subtle. They know how to play people. They show you what you want to see. That’s how it’s so easy to fall for someone with this personality type. But, that doesn’t mean there aren’t signs you should note to avoid.
1. They always turn the conversation back to them.
It doesn’t matter what you’re talking about, your date always finds a way to make it about them. They recall stories that are similar to the one you may have been telling. While this is a normal process of relating to others, a narcissist will take this to the extreme.
In fact, it may start feeling like you’re not even having a conversation. Your date is just waiting for you to finish what you’re saying to say what they want to. It may even start to feel like your date has no genuine interest in you. There’s a good chance that’s true. You’re likely to spend the entire date listening to them talk about themselves.
2. They seem impatient and act entitled.
They may have requested a specific table in a well lit area, likely by a window.
If your date is the less-than-subtle narcissist, you’ll catch them looking at their reflection in the window. If your date is more subtle, you won’t catch this one right away. But narcissists always feel like they are special. They want everyone to treat them like they are.
Your date may act irritated if the service at the restaurant or coffee house is slow. Your date may complain about it, even. It’s always a bad sign to hear constant complaints.
3. Every time you look away, your date demands you attention back to them.
No matter what is going on, your date will expect your full attention. In fact, your date may even get whiny and complain if it isn’t given.
A person with a narcissistic personality always wants to be the center of attention. Your date will likely one of the most charismatic people you’ve ever gone out with. They may strike up conversations with random people wherever you are. Your date just wants all eyes in the room on them.
4. Your date tends to brag, or seems like they are fishing for compliments.
Along with constant attention, a narcissistic person will also require constant praising. They might mention how much work it was to get the restaurant reservation or the tickets to the show you’re going to see. Whatever they have accomplished, they want acknowledgment and praise for it. It won’t matter how much praise you give your date either. They are still going to want more.
5. The chemistry is intense yet empty, but you want more.
You may be so intrigued by your date that you haven’t noticed any of the other signs. You may think it’s great that you’re hitting it off so well, and invite your date back to your place. Narcissists are known to convince people to do what they want. They are well versed in manipulation.
While the physical encounters may be great, they will lack any real fulfillment. A narcissist, after all, only cares about themselves.
Now that you’ve got some idea of the personality traits to avoid, one last piece of advice is: Make sure you’re noticing.
Watch for these signs whenever you’re going out with someone new. You don’t want to end up playing the shadow on the stage of the narcissists life.