CPTSD, PTSD, OCD and Trauma: How Creating Boundaries Will Set You Free

For the last few months, I’ve started telling myself I can no longer cry because things are hard. Because life is hard. Because crying does nothing to change it. I’m not referring to the pain-releasing crying that is healing. I’m referring to the defeated crying that keeps me down. Stuck in an underworld. Unable to see my way out. 

But what I’m realizing is that I can set boundaries with myself. Boundaries that will help me rise up when I’m feeling pulled down. Boundaries that will help me feel productive and not burned out. Boundaries that will help me remember who I am — that will help me find my way out of the darkness. The boundaries I set save my obsessive mind from falling down that dark hole — into the nothing — no matter how intriguing or inevitable that hole may seem. It’s all about boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. And then more boundaries. 


Trauma, Empathy and Mindfulness: Creating and Holding Space and Boundaries

After suffering extreme loss of myself, I’m learning to let go of the pain. To move all the pain and trauma out of my body to create space for love and joy. For regardless of what happened or what happens, life moves on. And it’s up to me how I live it. 

During this process, I’m also learning how to create space for another. Because when it comes to someone else's suffering, to someone else's pain, it is sometimes more difficult to let go. Perhaps it's because it is not my pain I’m holding onto — so I don’t recognize it in the same ways as I do my own. Perhaps it’s because I’m still learning boundaries: where I end and another begins. Either way, I’m learning I have to create and hold space in order for either of us to have the chance to heal. 


OCD, PTSD, SPD and COVID: Masks, Panic Attacks and a Trip to Target 

Right before COVID hit, I was just starting to break free from the stiff hold my rules have had on me for decades. The rules I’d set in place to help myself survive were slowly lessening. Melting away as I learned to let go. And everyday things like going to the store started feeling easier. Less panic-inducing. But now that COVID outbreaks are the reality, my need to control my environment is back in full swing. Causing me to risk having a panic attack every time I leave the house.

Childhood Emotional Neglect

CPTSD, PTSD, OCD and Intergenerational Trauma: The Danger of Controlling and the Joy of Letting Go

Learning to practice mindfulness has helped me understand what it means to let something go. Growing up with a whole host of issues, it was something that was said to me often: “Just let it go.” As if it was easy. But I couldn’t. Because I didn’t even know what I was supposed to be letting go of. 

In order to truly let go, we have to face ourselves. And all of our pain. And all of our fears. All of the things that have happened to us. That we’ve done or that we've been a victim of. Our darkest secrets. The secrets our ancestors probably carried too. And then, as we do the work to heal, day after day after day, we will learn to let go. And in the place of all the things we let go of — the things we used to try to control — we will find joy. 


CPTSD, PTSD and Intergenerational Trauma: We Are in This Together (And 8 Tips for Healing)

Dear Reader,

It's been a tough few weeks, and I was at a loss for what to write about because I have been too depressed to feel creative. But then as I caught up on emails, I noticed how important it is for those of us suffering to know that others share our struggles. Not that others suffer, that part is heartbreaking. But when you suffer from disorder and if you've suffered a trauma, you can feel completely alone, and the support of knowing others get it — get you — is sometimes the first step toward healing.


CPTSD, PTSD and Intergenerational Trauma: How the Pandemic Became the Predator 

I knew the pandemic was triggering for me. Bringing back old compulsions. Familiar fears. Making me feel stuck. Anxious. Ready to fight, flee or freeze. But I didn’t quite understand why until speaking with my psychotherapist and learning that it is precisely my fear response that has made me relapse into a post-traumatic stress response. So basically, the pandemic became the predator. 

Complex Post-traumatic Stress Disorder

CPTSD, PTSD and Intergenerational Trauma: Living In a Fight-or-flight Response and 9 Steps to Getting Out 

When you suffer CPTSD or PTSD long enough, you become wired for trauma, making even the slightest upset a potential trigger. Sending you into a tailspin. A downward spiral. A fight-or-flight response. 

And when you experience intergenerational trauma, trauma from your ancestors that rides on the strands of your DNA, you live in a fight-or-flight response. Every day. Day after day. And it takes everything you have to get out.