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Control

Stockholm Syndrome: Loving Our Abuser

Reading old emails exchanged with my captors makes me sick. Nauseated. Loquacious lovey-dovey's and toe-curling coo's drip from our email conversations. The contrast between our communication back then is in stark contrast to the barbs and silences now.

It's contradictory. Crazy-making.


Backstory: My parents forbade...


Control

Danger, Will Robinson: Paranoiac Parents

Bed bugs: mother's latest paranoiac fad. Her home's gonna' get infested with the little devils. She's sure of it. Mother's paranoia is nothing new. She's been this way all my life. And her mother is a paranoiac, controlling narcissist too. Together they form a hysterical duo, collecting and trading dangers like some people trade baseball cards. Their "Danger Scrapbook" is second-to-none, bulging with terrors of every description.


General

If (Fill-In-The-Blank)…You Might Be a Narcissist (Pt 1)

Narcissists do and say the funniest things. Well, it's only funny from a safe distance when not aimed at you! So, I thought, why not compile the funniest, the craziest, the furthest-out and most flabbergasting things narcs have said and done!? Comedian Jeff Foxworthy is renowned for his signature comedy line, "If (insert redneck trait)...you might be a redneck." One of my favorites is, "If you have an engine hangin' in your tree...you might be a redneck!" So I thought, why not gather tales in the same format: "If (fill-in-the-blank-with narcissist's-shenanigans)...you might be a narcissist."


clairvoyance

Narcissists Faced With Their Narcissism: Kablooey!

"At the name of {narcissism} each one of the children felt something jump...inside. Edmund felt a sensation of mysterious horror. Peter felt suddenly brave and adventurous. Susan felt as if some delicious smell or some delightful strain of music had just floated by her. And Lucy got the feeling you have when you wake up in the morning and realize that it is the beginning of the holidays or the beginning of summer."


Control

Confessions of an Ex-Narcissist

I understand narcissists. I used to be one. It started during my teenage years, but thankfully, didn't last long. My parents both caused and screamed me out of narcissism. I wrote about it last year in my personal blog as a letter to my grandiosely narcissistic father and covertly narcissistic mother.


clairvoyance

Narcissistic Granny: Dancing the Granny Two-Step (Pt. 2 of 3)

Imagine to yourself the most judgmental person you know. Then double it. They live alone in the rarefied air atop their Ivory Tower of Holiness, staring down in righteous condemnation at those pathetic lifeforms below (i.e. the entire human race). No detail is too small nor insignificant to escape their withering, frigid disapproval. Yep, that's my Grandma. But you've already met her in my article, Narcissistic Granny: It's a Multi-Generational "Thang."


Catatonic

Self-Care: Essential After Narcissistic Abuse (Pt. 1 of 2)

On Valentine's Day we devote ourselves to those we love most — our husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends and yes, parents and children. But what about the one we neglect the most, berate the most and shame the most: ourselves. Surely, a little of that love should trickle down to us, too. In The Screwtape Letters, the great C. S. Lewis wrote, "When they [humans] have really learned to love their neighbours as themselves, they will be allowed to love themselves as their neighbours.” I suspect the majority of children from narcissistic and otherwise dysfunctional homes have perfected the art of loving and caring for our neighbors. But we haven't got the first clue on how to love and care for ourselves. So this Valentine's Day, let's chat about self-care. To jump to Part 2, click here!