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Bait-and-Switch

Revisiting The Nice-Nasty-Nice-Nasty Carrot-and-Stick Pattern

In September 2017, I wrote an article titled The Nice-Nasty-Nice-Nasty Narcissistic Carrot-and-Stick Pattern.  It was one of those articles that "writes itself" because I merely had to copy->paste what someone else had written (in no particular order) and add a little narrative along the way. Two-and-a-half years later, it's a particularly apropos time to dust off the old article, update it just a smidgen and take it for a spin as the original writer of the quotes is now insisting that they actually do "care" and that I "don't know" them at all.

I beg to differ...and have their words to prove it.

As the old adage goes, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." And now for your reading enjoyment, here is the updated version of The Nice-Nasty-Nice-Nasty Narcissistic Carrot-and-Stick Pattern:



Art

Living Richly In Isolation: The Mind May Freely Roam

The world is rediscovering what introverts always knewWhile your body may be isolated, your mind is always free. Regardless of your situation, your mind may freely roam...and sheep may safely graze. (Just a little "yoke" for you Bach geeks.)

We work so hard, day in and day out, to afford and furnish our homes yet spend so little time in them. This isolation thing may be the first time in years that many people have spent significant unbroken time enjoying their own homes and families.



Boundaries

Mask and Gloves: Feelings of Being “The Weird Kid” Revisited

Last Tuesday was the last time I left the house. It'd been a fortnight since I last went grocery shopping, so we needed a little bit of everything. Because of Michael's pre-existing health issues, naturally I went prepared: gloves, mask, Lysol.

"Surely," thought I, "this is our new normal. There will be others wearing masks. After all, even vain celebrities are wearing gloves and masks."



Coronavirus

Tips for Self-Isolation: Here’s How To Be Happy Being Home 24/7

We all dream of the day we can stay home all day. Waking naturally at any hour without an alarm clock, padding around in our PJs, doing whatever we want, whenever we want. Bliss!

Usually we have to wait for retirement, but due to the coronavirus, many of you may find yourselves spending twenty-fours  hours in your home,  day after day, perhaps for the first time ever.



Evil

Narcissism: Getting Back to Basics

Four hundred and thirty articles later...

If you write about narcissism as much as I do, sooner or later, it takes on a life of its own. The more you sink your teeth into the topic, the more the term "narcissist" conjures up a mental image of two horns and a forked tail.

That's just not right.

That's why I've wanted to write this "Back to Basics" article for quite some time. To try to dispel the caricature narcissism has taken on while boiling down narcissism to the most succinct summary possible. The "lowest common denominator," if you will.



Agoraphobia

Coronavirus: Keep Calm and Carry On

Alright, let's cut the crap. We're all worried about the coronavirus. Don't tell Michael because I act nonchalant but I'm concerned too.

So instead of stewing, I decided to write what it's bringing to mind for me. Pull up a chair, put on The Best of Pavarotti (narc alert!) and pour yourself a glass of Shiraz. (Apparently, if you take a "What Wine Will You Like" online quiz and answer "Oh yucky, get it away" to every question, they recommend Shiraz. Opinion: Meh.)



Dead

Torn! Death of a Narcissist

In May of 2019, I was notified that one of my engulfing narcissistic relatives had died.

As it turns out, the people who rushed to tell me had jumped to conclusions. There are many relatives who share that particular surname. They just assumed it was my particular narcissist who had passed away.

In fact, my narcissist had not died. However, during the thirty-six hours when I believed it to be true, I experienced a plethora of emotions. It gave me a sneak-preview of how one feels when an engulfing narcissist passes away.

This is a short excerpt of what I wrote during that time.