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Abusive

Hope for the Weird Kid at School (Pt 2 of 2)

There's always one. That kid in school who has the wrong clothes, the wrong shoes, the wrong hairstyle. On the outside, they're not like the other kids. In many ways, I was that weird kid. Here's the second part of my imaginary diary, reflecting my feelings as a little tiny girl and informed by what I know now as a grown woman. To read Part 1, please click here. Just know this: it's not you. You're not organically "weird." In most cases, it's parents with lack of empathy who almost seem to go out of their way to make their child "weird." At the end of this article is a little something I learned by being the weird kid and wrote, from my heart, to encourage all the other "weird kids" out there. Dedicated to all the wonderful "Weird Kids" - old and young.


Abuse

Diary of the Weird Kid at School (Pt 1 of 2)

There's always one. That kid in school who has the wrong clothes, the wrong shoes, the wrong hairstyle. On the outside, they're not like the other kids. In many ways, I was that weird kid. My husband was too. This article is for every little girl who felt weird and out-of-it (me) and for every little boy who didn't receive enough haircuts and had to wear a hand-sewn orange velvet jumpsuit (my husband.) This is my imaginary diary, reflecting my feelings as a little tiny girl and teenager and informed by what I know now as a grown woman. Just know this: it's not you. You're not organically "weird." In most cases, it's parents with lack of empathy who almost seem to go out of their way to make their child "weird." Some may be clueless, some neglectful, somei n a cult or cult-like family, some knowingly abusive, some paranoid and worried. At the end of this article (Part 2) is a summary encapsulating everything I learned by surviving being "weird" written, from my heart, to encourage all the other "weird kids" out there. Dedicated to all the wonderful "Weird Kids" - old and young.


ACON

A Very Codependent Marriage Indeed

Usually the terse summary of an article comes at the very end, after I've blethered on for 1,000 words or so. Ah, but this article is going to be summed up at the beginning. So, how do you summarize a very codependent marriage? I steal it shamelessly from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen: "You are each of you so complying, that nothing will ever be resolved on; so easy, that every servant will cheat you; and so generous, that you will always exceed your income." THE END


Control

Life Isn’t as Serious as Narcissists Want You To Think! (Pt 2 of 2)

(Have you read Part 1 yet? Click here...or what follows won't have any context.)

That is the very antithesis of how narcissists live and how they taught us, influenced us and forced us to live. They performed; they didn't really live. So we learned to perform, not really live. We work, raise children, clean, cook, mow, trim, garden to look right to others. To prove "I'm okay! See!?! Everything is perfect. I deserve to be alive. I'm a worthwhile human being. See!?...


#metoo

Learning to Wink: Life Isn’t as Serious as Narcissists Want You To Think! (Pt 1 of 2)

"Tighten up!" he told me, his hands balled into fists to demonstrate what tightening-up should look like. "Tighten up. We don't live like other people." Well, that's for damn sure. I'd made the mistake of trying to be normal. Ah, foolish me. I forgot how to live in the narcissist's way. That's how narcissists live...all tightened-up. Terrified of not appearing perfect at all times. Terrified you won't be perfect and will reflect poorly on them. They take life so...damn...seriously and insist that we do too. Good grief!!!


Calm

Narcissistic Abuse and the Movies that Counteract and Contradict It

I know, I know. Movies are "just movies." Make-believe events in a make-believe world. They're not real. Or are they? I believe movies give us a glimpse into a world that could be...if only we could escape the mind-control, iron-grip and false guilt of our narcissists. If we could jump out of the same tired old mental pathway they set us on...that has been carved ever deeper in our psyche as we trudged unhappily along it, day after day, year after year.