One thought on “Mask and Gloves: Feelings of Being “The Weird Kid” Revisited

  • March 25, 2020 at 9:02 am

    Dear Lenora!
    Thank you very much for your blog! I also live in an engulfing narcissistic family, similar to yours in many things. However, my parents are NOT religious, not obsessive-compulsive and do not have phobias. They are not obsessed with cleanliness or sexual abstinence. They look “modern”, “secular”, “intellectual” and just “perfect”. For example, instead of dressing me in ugly way, they buy me clothes that “suit me best”. They even try their best to look “normal” and harshly criticize everything “crazy”. I am accustomed to thinking the fears of my parents are “common sense” and based on “real” facts. It’s difficult for me to violate their rules as I believe they help me to be a better person or to avoid “real” troubles. I was even thinking it is stupid and even non-adult NOT to follow them. I still struggle to understand HOW these rules infantilize me. I used to believe my parents are experts in everything and even regarded people who are NOT like my parents as “weird”.
    Now my organization let me work from home. My Mom prohibits me to travel by public transport or visit public spaces. She made me take a break in dancing classes until the end of the pandemic (my dancing school still works). She says I have to be cautious and wear a mask when I use a taxi because drivers can be sick. According to official data for today, my very big country has only 658 people infected with Covid-19 and 0 deaths, knock on wood. They say most people infected have returned from Italy or other countries with worse situation. But my Mom retells me rumors that not enough people are tested, not all people are taking necessary precautions, the government may conceal the true number of infections and etc. I am only 26, but I live with a surgically corrected heart condition. I feel WELL, I am generally HEALTHY, but I should beware of serious infections. So, my Mom tells me to be cautious. I wash my hands very well, try not to touch my face, leave home only to visit a doctor, for grocery shopping or for a short walk. I wear a mask in case I get into a crowd. However, she says it’s crazy to walk in a mask on a half-empty street when it’s needed only when there are really many people around.
    So my personal situation is complicated. I have difficulty distinguishing normal from weird and especially when there are real reasons to be careful. I have a temptation to ask the people around me instead of making a decision myself. And I don’t know whether my precautions are normal or excessive and what measures are common sense to protect such people as Michael.

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