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Cult Withdrawal: More Painful than Grieving a Death

The bluegrass band Monroe Crossing plays a poignant version of an old song, Far Side Bank of Jordan, which speaks emotionally about being reunited with loved ones in Heaven:

And I’ll be waiting on the far side banks of Jordan
I’ll be sitting drawing pictures in the sand
And when I see you coming,

4 thoughts on “Cult Withdrawal: More Painful than Grieving a Death

  • April 14, 2018 at 6:13 pm

    “The grief over the people you loved the most, whose good opinion meant the most to you, who now look down upon you from the confines of their cult with disapproval, disgust and worst of all, disappointment”. Oh I can so relate. It felt like a limb had been removed. And although I did go back once years ago I knew that I had been “hoovered” back by sheer manipulation. Finally I found the courage to leave for good because I felt I was just drowning in all the enmeshment and emotional abuse. It was heart wrenching but for my own sanity, my own peace of mind I had to escape. It’s taken me time and education to find some peace and also to realise that it was never my fault.

  • April 14, 2018 at 8:08 pm

    Dang Lenora! You describe it right, a living death. Thanks be to God that the sun keeps coming up, my heart keeps beating and I keep breathing to remind me that there is life in this and beyond this. I have some pretty wonderful people to share life with. I’m focusing on that now, instead of the loss.

  • April 15, 2018 at 11:18 am

    Thank you for writing this. I was in a cult religion, was married to a spoiled, narcissistic boy for 32 years and part of a cult like family all those years. I left for work one morning and my entire world changed by the time I got home. My ex turned my children, his entire family and most of mine against me. Its been years and no one has spoken to me. Six months after this, my father committed suicide. My world was officially shattered.My ex lost his brother to suicide. Not one single person from his family contacted me. The ex had the nerve to tell me my dad did this for him, in a way to honor my ex for something that had happened. In that moment I understood why women flip out and kill their husbands.I now realize, after a nervous breakdown and intense therapy, that all of this was not my fault. Now, I’m thankful for being removed from all of that, but I’m still grieving. The pain will always be there, but I’m thankful for where I am. I agree, I would not wish this on anyone.

  • June 15, 2019 at 1:00 pm

    Being in a cult is like being in a bad marriage.
    The good news is you know when you won over the cult when you don’t really think about anything they do anymore they’re not a concern in your life that’s when you have won.

    I wrote something here abiut the cult I was in…


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