5 thoughts on “The Exhaustion of Living with a Narcissist (and craving peace afterwards)

  • October 8, 2017 at 5:15 pm

    My goodness you’re so right. The peace is unbelievable.

  • October 11, 2017 at 4:36 am

    I was so enmeshed with my narc that when he abandoned me, I rebelled at the idea things would get better. My mom told me I’d feel so relieved not to walk on eggshells or be treated like a servant. Well, slowly but surely, I’m discovering it’s true.

    I can go to sleep without fear he’ll hold my slumber hostage; I learned narcs will do that. He’d keep me awake and upset, all the while berating me for upsetting him. The next morning, he’d either continue his emotional battering of me, or worse, he’d breeze through as though it were all a trifle while still getting in a few digs. I’d still be expected to perform–go to work, cook, pay bills, run errands, and clean. If I indicated I was tired or dared to bring it up, the torture began again. And I believed I deserved it because he said I did!!! I voud never return to that!

  • October 11, 2017 at 4:41 am

    Sorry, I covfefed. I meant “could,” but I also “vowed” to never return to that in Scarlett O’Hara fashion.

  • October 11, 2017 at 2:20 pm

    For the first time in my life (60 years) I no longer have to be in “survival” mode. I’m paying for having Narcissistic parents, Narcissistic Ex husbands (2) and Narcissistic bosses (several) with my health (Diabetes 2). Where I used to live and function with extreme stress 24/7 I no longer can handle even the smallest amount of it. I don’t have any friends or social life cause I learned early on not to trust anyone. BUT my muscles are slowly relaxing and I’m less fearful. I’ve gone NC with the only Narcissist still alive (my Mom) though she haunts me every night in my Night Terrors.
    People who haven’t lived what we have CAN’T BEGIN to relate to or understand our world.

  • April 2, 2018 at 2:41 am

    You hit the Bullseye! My Ex Narc couldn’t stand for me to sleep or sit down.
    He would lose his mind if I talked on the phone. He would set & stare at me, telling me “Get Off the F**king phone”, Because He couldnt hear Everything that was said by who I was talking to. I would hang up, then the ‘Interrogation’would begin & continue for hours on end.
    Takeing my dtr to a birthday party was just abt inpossible. As soon as I told him abt it, he would say “How long have you known abt this”? If I said I knew for a week, & didnt immediately tell Him abt it, he would go into a Rage, saying I was Lying to him & he wasnt going to tolerate my lying & kniveing”!! ??
    Then the Interrogation would begin- who is this? (Parents of the child). ~Where do they live,how old are they?
    ~Where do they work? ~How much money do they make? Etc, etc.
    ~What kind of car do they drive? I told him its Rude to ask these Personal questions of people, which pissed him off even more. He said “You Better find out, or You aint going a Damn place”!!. So… If I told him a week or 2 ahead of time (if I knew abt it) it was the Same interrogation, only longer. I did the same as you- started staying home. It wasnt worth the beatdown.
    He told me I was Stupid for drinking coffee because He didnt like coffee bcause it tastes like S**t. So, for the 1st 5 yrs, I didnt drink coffee.
    He hated for me to read anything, saying “What or Who do you want to know abt thats in the paper”!? You bound to want to know Something in the paper Or you wouldnt read it. So…I didnt ever read the paper at home & disposed of it b4 I got home.
    I have no idea How I lived thru this. This isnt the worst of it. God was with me.


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