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I’m Not a Big “Law of Attraction” Fan & Here’s Why

Sometimes I ask for the ocean and get a wave. But now I know that, since it is my soul doing the asking, the wave is necessary if the ocean is ever to follow.

I love it when I meet a new mentor. Often when this happens, I discover that my new mentor is already connected (through six degrees of separation – how else?) with other beloved mentors.

For example, recently my Instagram feed popped up with a little quote by someone named Martha Beck. Intrigued, I followed the breadcrumbs to investigate…..and discovered that even Oprah has heard of Martha Beck, along with Byron Katie, another cherished mentor, and pretty much everyone else on the planet.

But “better late than never” being one of my many guiding life principles, I headed right over to Ms. Beck’s blog to have a look. Immediately I noticed a post titled “The Law of Attracting Trojan Horses.”

The moment I started reading I solved a mystery that’s been plaguing me since the uber-popular “Law of Attraction” phenomenon first burst onto the self-help scene.

Just to be clear up front, I really wanted to like the law of attraction. I wanted to believe in it.

And I desperately wanted to believe that I wasn’t the sole solitary idiot who couldn’t figure out how to work it properly. As one mega-blogger, author, teacher, leader, after another touted the life-changing principles of the law of attraction, I as dutifully wrote out and repeated my affirmations, day after week after month.

And yet somehow, I kept attracting the opposite of what I was affirming! 

It honestly felt like every light-filled affirmation – for fun, romance, money, wisdom, chocolate, more vacation time – had an evil dark twin, and repeating the light twin’s affirmation brought that dark twin running straight to me.

This didn’t just happen a few times, mind you. The more determined I became to get the law of attraction to work right, the more evil dark twins I attracted.

Here, it probably won’t surprise you to learn that soon thereafter I became an official Law of Attraction school dropout.

But then a few days ago, I happened across Martha Beck and her wonderful blog about trojan horses.

She explained – very simply and directly – that the law of attraction communicates directly with our soul rather than with our mind. She shared that what our soul wants is often different than what our mind wants. For instance, our mind thinks “chocolate!” and our soul thinks “health!” Or our mind thinks “money!” and our soul thinks “renunciation!”

Instantly upon reading Martha Beck’s blog post, I became aware of how my soul clearly has my mind in a headlock, and likely has had for quite some time now. So it probably never really did matter what my mind affirmed or how avidly it affirmed it. I was always still only going to get what was good for me, whether it was what I wanted at the time or not.

And to be honest, I still want money, romance, chocolate, more vacation time, all of the above. But I want all the other stuff too. I want the wisdom, the non-attachment, the compassion, the lovingkindness, the renunciation, the contentment, the peace. And today, I am also aware that once I fill up with the latter, the presence or absence of the former probably won’t bug me nearly so much.

In fact, I am already feeling more peace and wisdom now that I realize the law of attraction principle was always working for me after all. I wasn’t doing it wrong. I wasn’t the only being on the planet who couldn’t figure out how to say a simple affirmation and get the desired response.

I just didn’t understand the deeper meaning of the new language I was trying to learn to speak. And I didn’t know which part of me was doing the speaking on behalf of all of me.

Now that I do, I realize I don’t even need the law of attraction to attract the trojan horses that are meant for me. They have always and already been heading in my direction, likely since the day I was born, and they are far too determined to be deflected from their destination.

They have also brought me wonderful gifts, albeit not the precise ones my mind or body might have been hoping or wishing for at any given moment. Looking back now, I wouldn’t trade them out if I could.

Except for maybe the one that was supposed to be filled with chocolate. That one I think I’d keep.

Today’s Takeaway: Have you ever had that distressing feeling like you are the only one on the planet who just can’t “get” some new popular phase or fad? Did that happen to you with the law of attraction craze? Or are you one of the ones who has had lots of success using the law of attraction principles to deepen and improve your life? I’d love to hear your thoughts!


I’m Not a Big “Law of Attraction” Fan & Here’s Why

Shannon Cutts

Parrot, tortoise & box turtle mama. Writer. Author. Mentor. Champion of all people (and things) recovered and recovering.

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APA Reference
Cutts, S. (2018). I’m Not a Big “Law of Attraction” Fan & Here’s Why. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 2, 2020, from


Last updated: 1 Jul 2018
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