46 thoughts on “He Blocked My Number?!

  • November 19, 2016 at 3:13 pm

    I agree that blocking is not a good idea in most cases. It really does show a lack of control and a lack of emotional maturity. It’s like “ghosting”.

    I have been on both sides of the blocking fence, having been blocked and having blocked someone. It feels awful either way, but especially being blocked – it’s a terrible, isolating, hopeless feeling not being able to communicate with someone. In my case, I wanted to apologize and reconcile with the person who blocked me (after getting over the hurt of having him block me!). It was painful not having that chance to express my real feelings, and to rectify the situation as best as I could. I dislike the feeling of leaving things with a mutually good resolution.

    Sometimes, though, a block is necessary – particularly in cases of abuse. Ideally, it will be time-limited/temporary, but in extreme cases it might need to be permanent. I had to block an online friend who started to get abusive after a misunderstanding. I blocked his WhatsApp messages because he would send dozens at a time, blowing up my phone with notifications, and his messages were filled with hurtful insults and untrue accusations. I did not block him from calling me, but because it would cost long-distance to call, he never actually did. Just goes to show how little he cared. In this case, I believe it was an act of self-care to block his abusive texts.

    Interesting and very relevant post, by the way! Thanks for reading my comment.

    Reply
    • November 19, 2016 at 3:15 pm

      Sorry, typo above: I dislike leaving things *without* a good, mutual resolution! (just to clarify). Thanks!

      Reply
      • November 19, 2016 at 4:44 pm

        Great insight Brenda and thanks for sharing with honesty!!

        Reply
    • April 3, 2017 at 1:08 am

      Let me start by saying, yes its a very difficult situation, the blocker is in control, the blockee is felt stagnant trying to put pieces together. I suggest that the individual should disconnect the phone number so you can be free and have a healthy life. There are plenty fishes in the sea. What happen if time pass by the blocker came from no where appear in your life and wants things to work out.You’re going to end up in postpartum depression even Anxiety’s because maybe you had unfinished business with him or her. Just keep yourself occupied and as time goes by he be out of your heart.Sorry to hear about this!!!!

      Reply
    • July 14, 2017 at 10:34 pm

      Did you ever unblocked him?

      Reply
      • July 14, 2017 at 11:15 pm

        Amy, thanks for checking me. I do, then don’t, then do.. i go back and forth… now, he’s not blocked but he was last week.. i know i have to get off the cycle of madness… it’s like what is it going to take… when there’s enough to block him but he finds a way in… e

        Reply
  • July 10, 2017 at 11:40 pm

    From my perspective Blocking a phone nuymber from an EX shows a Lackof Maturity & communication skills.
    Sometimes people BLOCK because they are under a LOT of pressure at work to perform a certain task. Once that task is over at work; do they then reconsile with the person & unblock them? 50% do and 50% don’t. Its a Control thing initially. The Blockee gets what they want, The one Blocked has to do something else with their time alone.
    Perhaps with this obvious sign of immaturity andfailure to communicate ( especial;ly early into a relationship) is perhaps one Major sign that you shouldn’t move forward with this person anyway.

    They are NOT mature enough to rationally sit down and discuss a solution to the problem. Sounds like they will NEVER discuss solutions to p[roblems,they just SLAM the door if they don’t get their way or fail to communicate. jmho

    Reply
    • July 2, 2018 at 8:41 am

      I have been trying to reach my friend for some reason I got obsessed text him until he text back, he was giving me a silent treatment he said was busy I know it was a lie, most of the times he text back I’m a strong independent woman oh boy this guy just made me desparate. I met him online we met once it was going great and I blew it his last text he told me I was a mouthy little bitch, stop nagging me , the world does revolves around your ass then blocked me

      Reply
      • July 2, 2018 at 12:28 pm

        Hey Liza, I can’t tell you how many people have been hurt by the whole blocking unblocking game. It is immature and cruel and a control feature for people that want the upper hand in a relationship so to speak. Honestly, I’ve been engaging in the block unblock game with an EX for way too long. It is silly and only causes harm, so I hope you are able to rid yourself of the torture, in other words, of him. e

        Reply
  • September 16, 2017 at 4:32 pm

    My boyfriend just blocked me and I’m feeling like I got my heart ripped out. I am having a panic attack.this is so childish and hurtful.I wish I could just move on and stop loving him. What should i do? I have no one to talk to and he knows that! I feel he is just trying to hurt me. And it is working.

    Reply
    • September 16, 2017 at 6:39 pm

      Hi Laurn, this might just be round run of blocking…. in other words, it’s probably not permanant and at some point he will unblock you and you’ll be back at square one till he may block you again. Point is, it is just like you said childish and hurtful and at some point, a child will become curious to know “I wonder if she’s tried to call me” and immediately you’ll be unblocked to serve his own selfish ego.

      Don’t fret. The blocking game is just that, a game. Don’t partake, just do your best to do you right now and ignore it till things shift, and they will.

      Reply
      • October 8, 2017 at 10:06 pm

        I was dating a controlling guy for 5 months and the last month I lived with him! I did not know he was controlling me until I went home at a different time that I Gave him because I was with my family! My belongings were all packed up and I was told that I had to go! He now has me blocked and said he moved on! How could he after just 3 weeks?

        Reply
      • October 9, 2017 at 2:58 pm

        He hasn’t moved on…. If he truly moved on he wouldn’t have to say that. e

        Reply
  • October 16, 2017 at 12:52 pm

    Mu babyddaddy and I came back home from a 4 day vacation. We argued on the way back and when we got home he left in his car then send me a tx to pack his work clothes that he needed a break from me that he was done and unhappy of me always giving him a hard time. I tx him last night n he blocked me but this morning he unblocked me but then blocked me again when i text him. Hes never blocked me before. Its painflu.

    Reply
    • October 16, 2017 at 4:25 pm

      Do nothing. Let him blockyou,and unblock, and then block you again. That’s the sad game of blocking. Don’t subscribe to it. You’re better then that. Just be patient and do you for now. e

      Reply
  • October 20, 2017 at 11:29 am

    Me and my guy split up 3 wks ago, caught him cheating, I still love him. We’re always on then off. Been together 3 years. He always comes back to me. But he’s blocked me this time and hasn’t txt. He’s never went this long without texting me. I’ve not called or tried getting a hold of him. I want him to know he has to change this time but I think he’s really done. Is he?

    Reply
    • October 20, 2017 at 12:54 pm

      People that are on and off again for three years aren’t over in three weeks. He’s not done with you. In my opinion… e

      Reply
  • December 11, 2017 at 8:03 am

    Had been dating guy for a little over a month. Sex was amazing and it seems lately that’s all we did. I know it was quick but we started not using protection.

    Three days ago, I blocked his messages and calls because I was angry and starting to develop feelings for him that I wasn’t sure he shared. He called me from anonymous numbers and sent messages begging for me to speak to him and to unblock him, which I did. He came over the next night and after unprotected sex, I inquired if he was indeed only sleeping with me and only have unprotected sex with me. He said no and nonchalantly replied, “I’ll use protection from now on”.

    When I sought a further explanation on why his answer had changed because he had previously told me I was the only one, he repeated his answer and reached for a condom to have sex again and I slapped his face and got out of bed.

    He came behind me and asked me was I crazy and started to put on his clothes to leave. I stopped him and apologized and explained that I had gotten emotional and it was my fault for putting my health in a man’s hands that I barely knew and felt he was very nonchalant about whole thing. He was very angry and kept saying how no woman has ever slapped him and how he could rearrange my face if he wanted, but that he wouldn’t retaliate.

    This conversation went around in circles for an hour or more with him saying he thought I was normal and now he see’s that I was a covert crazy woman. He then asked me to delete all the pictures we had taken together. I refused and said that he was overreacting. We then had unprotected sex again and I fell asleep only to be awoken again in a couple of hours with him talking about his anger at my haven slapped him. He said he couldn’t sleep now because maybe I would stab him in his sleep. He said, “I don’t know what you will do anymore.”

    I assured him he was exaggerating and that I was just emotional and it was wrong what I did. He said that my emotions was not his problem and that did not give me a right to assault him. He then questioned why I slept with him with no condom and said he didn’t force me and didn’t rape me and it was my decision.

    We ended up having sex again for over an hour at which during, he slapped me twice harder than I had slapped him. The second time, I grabbed his hand and said, “You’ve hit me back, we are even now… don’t hit me again.” He said that we were not even and got a little aggressive during sex, slightly choking me. Did I enjoy it? Slightly, yes.

    We then went to sleep and he again woke me up in an hour fully dressed talking about what happened. We ordered food as about 10 hours had now passed from the original slap at 2 am. It was not 12 noon. We ate, laughed, talked. We then had sex again and I fell asleep again to be woken up to him dressed saying he’s leaving and no woman will ever slap him and that he is a strong man and how dare I.

    He said he wished he had never met me and I was crazy. I was growing tired of this merry go round, and basically just listened. We hugged and had sex again and afterwards we talked and I said maybe to keep confusion and emotions down, we should just use a condom for now on. He said he thought that was best also.

    In about an hour, he started kissing my back and caressing me and attempted to penetrate me without a condom. It was now about 4 pm. I stopped him and handed him a condom in which he tossed on the floor, got off of me, and laid down away from me.

    I fell asleep and in an hour, he again woke me up fully dressed and said he was leaving. I walked him to the door and he would usually turn to kiss me, but didn’t. I grabbed his shoulder and asked what was going on. He said you slapped me and it’s over…. no woman hits me.

    I knew I was wrong to hit him, but thought we had made up and he had forgiven me. I said that I was confused and he repeated that it was over.

    I then just reopened the door and he walked out and left.

    When he left, I sent him two messages on whatsapp and he read them and then blocked me and deleted me from facebook. I called his phone several times with no answer.

    Did he overreact or did I cause all this mess myself? We also work together and I just don’t know what he will say and do. I didn’t feel we were enemies enough to block each other permanently and he slept with me all day unprotected and to just leave and just do that without a further conversation is hurtful and made me feel used.

    I don’t think he’s pretending and feel he is really done.

    Is he a douche bag or did I just blow it by losing control and becoming violent first? Is there anyway to reconcile this? Should I speak to him at work or NO!!!

    I saw him yesterday at work, two days after incident. He was sitting in the coffee shop where I have never seen him before (In two months, I’ve only ran into him twice at work, this being the second time) and just ordered my coffee as I chatted and smiled with other workers and then left without saying a word. He, however, has asked me before why we don’t ever see each other at work and I told him that I usually just go to the coffee shop and that’s it and he told me then, “Oh that’s why… I never go to the coffeeshop.”

    Anyway… was he there to see me or just a coincidence? As of now, three days later, going into the fourth day, I am still blocked from contacting him. I have not called since that first day he blocked me either from my number or another just so you know. I will respect his decision, but my hope is to be unblock.

    Please help and sorry for the typos as I typed in a rush.

    Reply
    • December 11, 2017 at 11:54 am

      Hi Mandy, I’m not quite sure what to say about this but, given everything you said in your comment, I think it is safe to stay as far away from this guy as possible, and be grateful that he has you blocked so you’re not caught up in all his (and your) drama. In the past when I have been blocked yeah it sucked BUT when I take a step back I am thankful cause it has kept me from going back. Do I think he went to the coffee shop by coincidence? No. And you’ll probably run into him again. And he’ll probably unblock you at some point and try to reach out, or show up at your place, who knows, blocking and unblocking is a stupid game that a lot of us play and it’s toxic. Try and stay strong, stay away, and just do you.

      Reply
    • March 7, 2019 at 1:00 pm

      The guy definitely sounded like he had red flags over him and sounded like he tried getting his fill before he got cut off.

      My ex used to be quite the narcissist and her way of trying to stay in control was saying I could have sex whenever I wanted because I was seen as a typical male that would never turn down that kind of offer.

      Ultimately it backfired on her and she left but apart from deleting her from FB I never had to block her as she knows her excuses and offers won’t work so the chances of a message are slim to zero.

      Reply
  • December 11, 2017 at 8:03 am

    Today makes the 9th day of being blocked

    Reply
    • December 11, 2017 at 12:10 pm

      Today marks the 9th day of your freedom.

      Reply
      • December 26, 2017 at 12:34 pm

        Thanks for your honesty Erica. Well as of today, I am still blocked and I never ran back into him at work. After two weeks of being blocked, we are now on vacation and I traveled to see family and I suppose he left the state to do so also. Hence, on January 3 when everyone goes back to work (including me and him), I would have been blocked for one straight month and counting. It has been difficult but I have attempted to be strong while not attempting to contact him in any alternative form. But it hurts so bad and I just hate it even came to this and of course I missed the second and I’m just being honest. I will focus on myself in meantime and forever but Erica please give wisdom….. will I ever be unblocked or is he done and this amount of time passing shows it????? Was he using slap as a scapegoat to flee relationship or was he just a man with principal that would not tolerate being slapped? Also why did you advise staying away? Thanks in advance

        Reply
      • December 26, 2017 at 6:46 pm

        I advise staying away cause he sounds like real bad news. No protection? Been there and it’s really stupid to let a guy go condomless. Not that your stupid cause I’ve been there but the whole thing is unsafe. So if you know he’ll be able to get away with unprotective sex then you have to protect yourself by staying away.

        The slap makes him an abusive jerk that would just be your first slap before more if you continued on with him.

        I’ve been in the blocked world and know it’s a silly game and cause it’s a game it will go back and forth. I’ve read so many sad stories from this post on blocking. People are angry, annoyed, ashamed, all across the board. It sucks but you stay strong. Worry about running into him at work down the road, for now, you do you.

        To be honest, I unblocked my EX after 6 months of blocking cause it was Christmas and was curious to see if he’d reach out. He did. And he just wanted sex and knowing how he is and how I am I knew it was way too easy to fall back into any trap and here I am back wondering should I re-block him? Change my number? Fold and have sex with him? It can get messey, fast.

        Time will bring him around and you just have to be ready to stay strong. You don’t need that stuff, Erica

        Reply
  • December 26, 2017 at 8:42 am

    I’ve been with my bf for 4 months. Lately I’ve been really like I’m not a priority to him given that he works for MTA and has crazy hours, friends and family as well. This past weekend he went to Atlantic City with his brother and friends to celebrate his brothers birthday. I sent him a long text message while he was in Atlantic City saying how I didn’t wanna be in the relationship because I’m not a priority to him and how we aren’t meant for each other and how I don’t feel like a girlfriend to him but I said all of thisniut of anger and frustration and I didn’t mean any of it. He never texted me back.. he blocked me so I tried texting him from my work phone and he blocked that number too. I emailed him explaining that I was just upset and didn’t mean what I said. And I also wrote him on watsapp and he blocked me on there too. I was just angry but I didn’t mean any of it. I was thinking how sending him an apology card with a letter attached along with a sentimental gift to her house. Do you think he’ll forgive me and give me another chance?

    Reply
    • December 26, 2017 at 11:02 am

      Hi Lucinda, these blocking stories are so sad, cause it’s as if people get caught up in an angry moment, and so rashly block someone and once that person finds out they get hurt so turn around and block that person back. It is such a silly game that often times goes back and forth with blocking then unblocking etc… I think sending him a hand written note is great idea. It’s old fashion but when you are blocked on all devices it’s kinda your last resort, for now….e

      Reply
  • February 4, 2018 at 6:22 am

    Hey Erica, was reading your post and comments cuz this is the second day I’ve been blocked, I don’t really know what to do.. he only blocked me because he has this guy over there as we speak and the guy told him not to call me because that’s disrespectful. So not only is he in a bind. He’s being controlled while making me feel bad. I really do still love him and I just would like to know where do I go from here? We’ve been together for almost three years and the past few days leading up to him blocking haven’t been bad at all…

    Reply
    • February 4, 2018 at 12:02 pm

      Did you try sending him an email telling him how you feel?

      Reply
      • February 5, 2018 at 6:43 am

        Yes, I even went up to the place of work to actually have a face to face conversation, that didn’t go so well cuz the other guy was up there.. I know that I wasn’t supposed to do that but I feel like I’m being left in the dark. Messages aren’t the same as the actual presence of someone in your face. He says we’re toxic.. but I think it’s just me.. I was diagnosed with schizophrenia and he never really read up on it enough to actually console me and get me the help I needed. I’m just seriously hurt and feel very betrayed. It’s been three years!!! You can’t see when someone is crying out for help????

        Reply
      • February 7, 2018 at 12:49 am

        Hey T, checking in. How are things, how are you? e

        Reply
      • February 10, 2018 at 3:20 pm

        Hey Erica, everything is fine. We haven’t talked since Monday morning. And I’m not reaching out to him anymore.. if he wants to talk to me. He will reach out. It seems like I am unblocked though. Kinda being stubborn but at the same time I am hurt

        Reply
  • May 18, 2018 at 2:16 am

    My boyfriend and I got into an argument. He said he needed some space as he is also under a lot of pressure with his son and work. I kept bugging him to get together and talk. Then finally told him I was angry and sent a bunch of texts telling him how awful he’s being to me. I overreacted. He told me me if I didn’t let it rest he would block me and never look back. He did end up blocking me. Do you think it’s permanent?

    Reply
    • May 21, 2018 at 8:58 pm

      Hey Lindsay, there are two types of blockers… those that block indefinitely, and those that play the blocking game. In other words, they block and unblock and block and unblock based on the circumstances at the time.

      I think most people are more prone to play the blocking game, which is not necessarily a good thing cause you can be in a limbo relationship contingent on being blocked or not blocked and it gets emotionally messy.

      So, ask yourself, do you want that?

      Reply
      • May 28, 2018 at 6:49 pm

        I think he unblocked me but did not respond to me text asking him to tell his son congrats on graduating. It’s like he hates me. I don’t know why.

        Reply
  • June 9, 2018 at 12:15 am

    I just came across this post looking for answers on the internet. My boyfriend of 3 years and I broke up a month ago. He ended things and it didn’t go well. The whole thing completely shattered me and he ended up blocking me on everything including his phone. I have not been dealing with it well to say the least and the night he blocked me I basically was pouring my heart out to him over a phone call and he hung up on me and blocked. I think blocking someone in this situation is pretty heartless especially knowing they are struggling. Not once was I stalking or harassing him. I just don’t feel like I can move on but I know I don’t have a choice in this situation. I just can’t wrap my head around how he can do this to me and feel ok about that. Any advice helps!

    Reply
  • August 3, 2018 at 10:00 pm

    Hey Erica..I also came across this post on the internet, while I was searching for answers to my problem.

    I was “dating” an interesting guy for a bit more than 1 month. He told me he has this disorder called ADHD. Before that, I’ve never met or got close to a person who had that, so I didn’t friggin now how to handle it. He had some other problems too (he was an orphan since his childhood, he has been abused…). He was a foreigner in my country, coming to learn psychology at one of our universities. It was his last year of master degree, his plan was to help ADHD children, which once he was, and I thought it’s a wonderful and respectable plan…

    From the first time I knew he may not the person for me in long-term, but my heart told another thing. I started to care about him and let myself feel for him. I let myself totally vulnerable because somehow I imagined maybe ‘he’s the one’. He taught me so much, and we talked a lot. We also had amazing sex.

    But somehow communication went wrong. I figured out, that he has a son at home, who waits for him, and his life is totally in chaos because he has to move back to his country jobless, depending on his ex and her family (I still don’t know how much he depends on them or her). He told me that he left them for chasing his dream of becoming a psychologist, and the woman let him go, that’s why he must repay the ‘debt’ to her. I knew he doesn’t want me to see him such vulnerable, to see his scars, but at one day, he was opened to me. He is a total controll-freak and he’s controlling his feelings. That day, he cried and told me all his pain. After and during that, I wrote texts, what may have caused a great emotional pressure to him. He told me that he don’t, can’t and will not love me, and I only causing pain for myself if I love him.

    The last day, before he flew back, we had the most amazing sex and the most painful goodbye. He just denied me and wanted to separate from my feelings, which was too much for him. After some crazy discussion, I begged for him to delete me because I can’t stand his disrespectful behavior. Then he did it. But I spotted, that he didn’t block me on every platform, so I apologized to him on Whatsapp. But I also ruined it, so he blocked me on that too, with the text “I just can’t put a hold on my feelings and I don’t respect his choice.” But I think he just didn’t want to care about my feelings, he wanted just to run away from all that. He wanted sex, and than he didn’t, and want again….I felt a bit used.

    He told me he planned to live alone because of his disorder and didn’t really wanted a relationship. I just couldn’t be imagined that somebody can locks his emotions that much, but I understood that he doesn’t want to abandon his son, and maybe this is more important for him than his own shitty love/feelings/life.

    May he ever felt any deeper what he didn’t want to tell? Will he ever miss me or think about me? We had so much positive time together, too…Will he ever unblock me, or do you think he is a permanent blocker (maybe because of the distance)? As a psychologist, is that a right choice from him, locking his feelings and move on with pushing me away? Will it be good for him in the future, or will he regret it someday? Is it as painful to him as for me?

    I just can’t find answers to these questions and feel like I will never know what is going on in his mind. I didn’t want to write a longer post, but I could, because the whole thing was much more complex, these were just the core problems. And I can’t really move on without proper answers and ending.

    Reply
  • January 12, 2019 at 12:35 pm

    You’re right, psychological nightmare. I just met this guy online, we’d texted a couple days. I wanted to talk over the phone, and he asked if it was because I was testing him (???).

    I was floored! Like what!?! Just so bizarre in my mind. I guess I sounded flustered. I told him I thought texting is a poor form of communication… and ironically he thought I was angry. I wasn’t. I was curious why he would think I was testing him (women told him they wanted to know he wasn’t catfishing). I wish I just said I wanted to hear his voice, instead maybe I shot a couple more texts than I should have, maybe I was a bit sarcastic (do people have a device that matches a voice with a real person)? I tried to steer it towards humor then (maybe he was offended when I joked “I know, you sound like The Godfather, don’t you?”) to let him know I wasn’t “angry” and lighten the mood.

    Finally I told him what I was looking for (not a texting buddy) and if he felt like calling me, I would love to hear from him. I even apologized twice during the convo.

    He blocked me. I had a hunch, went back on the date site and found indeed he was gone from my messages.

    Wth? Honestly, I beat myself up, but I wasn’t mean. I think. I was just trying to talk. I wasn’t suspicious untiiil he thought I was testing him because I desired a phone conversation. I’m crushed. He had so many qualities difficult to find in one person (age, not wanting kids, handsome, doesn’t drink, spiritual (Buddhist oddly enough) etc).

    It makes you feel worthless, like your entire humanity was dismissed. I felt like he totally misread me, and isn’t even interested in what I have to say. Best if he just stated “I don’t want to talk about this anymore right now”. Sucks. Just sucks.

    Reply
  • January 17, 2019 at 1:59 am

    My on and off bf of 6 years blocked me again. I lost count of how many times he’s done this to me. It is just as painful and emotionally draining as the first time. We are in a LDR so when he blocks me I have absolutely no way of contacting him. He literally cuts off our only form of communication and it literally drives me insane. I am in a constant state of panic and anxiety. There are no words for how it makes me feel. He broke up with me and just started to ignore me. After being together for long I didn’t understand how he could just ignore me like I don’t exist.I did make the mistake of texting and calling trying to get answers. So he blocked me. It’s been a week of one day being blocked another day not then blocked again. When he does replay and I try to talk to him he will just send a few texts arguing with me then bam blocked mid conversation with usually no warning.i never get to finish my thought or come to any sort of resolution with him. Once he decides he’s done talking to me I’m blocked.And I’ll wait and try to contact him hours or a day later and then I’m unblocked just for the pattern to repeat. It’s driving me insane. It’s turning me into that “crazy girl”. I feel so dumb that the act of being blocked can completely turn my word upside down and that it has so much control over me, my actions and my emotions. I just want to ask him why? Why? Why? Do you do this to me ?Why do you put me through this tourture? He told me this time isn’t like the other times and that he’s really done with me…is this the final block..

    Reply
    • January 17, 2019 at 2:53 pm

      Drop him Celina. The block unblock game is toxic and mentally draining. In my opinion, you don’t need that mayhem in your life. I was caught up in it for a year and it was horrible. Thanks for sharing. e

      Reply
  • February 14, 2019 at 5:58 pm

    I dated a guy I met online for about 3 months. When I first met him he was a little different, but I wanted to give him a chance. At first things were good, he would text me a lot and call me and all the sudden things started to slow down. I asked if he was still interested in me and he said yes that he was an introvert and had times of wanting to be alone and he also said he had a boring life and didn’t have much to talk about.

    I started to notice he was somewhat rude to waiters when we went out to eat and he wouldn’t hold the door open for me, he would go inside first. Even when we ordered food, he would always go before me. Once day we went to eat and the waitress said, “ladies first”, but he had already started ordering his food and then stopped. His entire demeanor said a thousand words. He even rolled his eyes and said whatever, but the nice person I am said no let him order.

    We started dating right after Halloween so when Christmas time came around I got him some things and he didn’t get anything and I told him not to worry about it. He said what he was looking at was either to cheap or very expensive. He also doesn’t buy his family anything for Christmas either so I didn’t think much about it. On New Years Night I asked for him to come over and he said he would and then the day of he said he didn’t feel well and wanted to stay home. He didn’t even bother to text or call me and say Happy New Years and I was very hurt. I know he wasn’t with anyone because he recently moved here a few weeks before we met.

    I have went out of my way for this guy.. I’ve made food and taken it to him, I’ve bought him food and taken it to him and he has only paid for lunch and/or dinner a few times. When I would go to his house, he wouldn’t offer anything to eat or drink. As a matter of fact he has heated up food and ate it without asking me. We have went out together and he has ordered and didn’t ask if I wanted anything. I have no idea what I seen in this guy except I enjoyed when we cuddled together at night and the way he held me. He wasn’t a guy that was interested in hearing about your feelings and he didn’t like to validate you either if you felt insecure. He even broke up with me and after a few days we worked it out and I asked why he broke up and he said because when he wanted to be alone he constantly had to tell me he wasn’t going anywhere. I told him any girl would feel insecure if the man is distant and it’s nice to know if someone cares for you and he said he did care for me.

    Around Thanksgiving he cooked this meal and he texted me throughout the say showing me pictures of what he was cooking. I went to his house after work and he had already ate and put up the food. He never asked if I wanted any of it and I was floored! We’ve had lunch plans and he cancelled on me saying he had to pick up his guitar and we would do lunch another time.

    So we broke up on a Saturday and by Tuesday night we were back together. We had planned on doing lunch that Thursday, but last min he cancelled saying he was busy. I was hurt but I had a gut feeling something was up. I created a fake profile on Tinder and found that he recently reactivated his profile. I was so hurt and mad.. He said on Wednesday he wanted us to work things out and then I find his profile on Tinder. So that Thursday I went to this house to confront him because he doesn’t respond well to these issues through text. When I arrived he could tell I was upset and he hugged me and asked if I was okay. I said no and he asked what was wrong. I didn’t say because I didn’t want to cry in front of this emotional unattached man. He mentioned let’s go out and I thought this would be a good time to go out let him have a few drinks and we could talk. Well I was wrong!

    After we went to a few places and he had some drinks and mind you once again he went to the bar ordered food and didn’t ask if I wanted anything. After he ate I had him read some text messages where he said he cared about me, that he wasn’t going anywhere, and he wanted us to work things out. I then showed him where he was on Tinder and his response was like, Yea, so what, I’m on there. I’m seeing what is out there. I never yelled or went off I simply asked why was he on Tinder when we were together. He completely shut down and said he didn’t have to answer my questions. He said he didn’t appreciate me getting him drunk to talk about it, which wasn’t my intention at all. He told me I could leave him there and he would call an Uber and I said I would take him home. After we went outside he was so emotionally dead.. he said he didn’t have time for games and I said I wasn’t the one in a relationship and on Tinder and he didn’t say much to that. He did say the damage was done and I would end up nagging him to death about it.

    Everything I asked he would say I’m not responding to that or I’m not in the frame of mind to talk about it. When we finally got in the car I told him if that is what he wanted to do is get on Tinder just to let me know and not waste my time. He wouldn’t say anything to me. I asked if he wanted to work things out and he said he wasn’t in the mind frame to talk about it. I tried so hard not to cry and not let him see it. When we finally made it to his house I said are you not going to say anything to me? He said no and I said you don’t have anything to say and he said no obviously. When he got out of the car I asked if I could go in with him and he said no and slammed my car door. I drove off and when I got home I noticed he had blocked me from facebook and his cell phone.

    Now I understand that maybe I didn’t handle the situation the right way and I can see being mad about it for a few days, but it’s been a week and still no contact with me. I’m human and make mistakes. I cannot fathom how you can do that to someone who was good to you. I never caused a scene and I was calm the entire time. If he wanted it over why not just say so instead of not saying anything and just blocking me? This is why I didn’t date for a very long time. You care for people and they don’t appreciate it.

    Reply
    • February 14, 2019 at 6:12 pm

      Wanda, this story is terrible. It’s beyond a blocking situation. This is a true classless asshole you dealt with. I’ve been in relationships with disrespect so know how bad it can be, but, I sought out therapy, and made a decision to work on myself cause I realized the problem was me. I’m not saying any of this disrespectful behavior is your problem or issue, but, you should look into why you are the victim in this situation. You’re a strong person to put up with his antics… and even stronger to address why you did to begin with, e

      Reply
  • March 6, 2019 at 12:20 am

    I recently got blocked by a friend that’s going through depression after a bad break up. For the first couple of weeks we talked almost everyday and all day and things started to look up. She asked for my number and we caught up for coffee she looked run downed and said her depression got worse after finding out that another person trying to help her also tried taking advantage of her situation and got verbally abusive when caught so a small part of the outing involved her send thing the guy a message telling him that contact was over.

    So she wanted to catch up again after she had time to herself but was still fine with messaging. So for two weeks I would send a message a few days apart asking how she was, where she’d like to go next and general gossip. These messages were read but no response until a few days ago when I was suddenly blocked.

    This hit hard as I don’t know if I did something wrong or if the block is a temporary situation or not as there was no goodbyes or go away messages.

    Reply
    • March 6, 2019 at 10:07 am

      Out of all the articles I’ve written Dave, this particular one seems to really hit home and there are a lot of comments set forth about it. The blocking game is a nightmare cause most of the time the person never gets an explanation and it can be hurtful and rude. I have mixed feelings on blocking cause I’ve done it then one day I’ll unblock and can go back and forth which is why I refer to it as a game. If someone blocks you there is not much you can do cause well, you’re blocked so, until you hear from the person otherwise it’s good to keep your distance. e

      Reply
      • March 6, 2019 at 12:43 pm

        It’s certainly been very taxing on the mind and body but depression affects everyone differently as I had it hit hard about about a year ago so when the messages got too much I’d just ask the person to ease up for a day or few hours so blocking never came up as a option. However their not dealing with it as well so blocking probably seemed like the only choice.

        I admit that an explanation would be nice as I am worried because their struggling. I’m really not sure what to do once contact is back as demanding answers or telling them that their actions caused a lot of pain and will just add to the already existing burden and likely make them to break off again.

        Reply
  • May 7, 2019 at 4:29 pm

    I’ve been blocked and it sucks

    Reply
  • May 27, 2019 at 3:31 pm

    I’m in a committed marriage and get blocked all the time. It’s his way of slamming the door on communication and resolving anything. I have acted so desperate at times and even lowered myself by emailing his phone in an attempt to talk things out. It’s been a viscous cycle for years and has taken a tole on my self worth. He blocks me if I blow up his phone. He blocks me if do not answer him right away. He blocks me all the time no matter what the circumstances are. and it’s horrible. I’m in emotional hell. He knows how bad it hurts me and continues to do it anyway. He not only blocks me but says it’s always my fault. I feel like I am arguing with a toddler. To all the ladies and men out their who are blocked on a regular basis and your partner uses this as a form of communication let me tell you… it doesn’t change. It only gets worse over time. It’s all a game to them about power and control. And someone trying to control you does not love you. They would not purposely hurt someone they cared about let alone block out any means of communication to resolve the matter. A mature partner would not use something as trivial as blocking to “work things out”. It’s a toxic mind F*** cycle. The blocked one does have control…. Leave their ass once it becomes a pattern. Two times is a pattern. I promise, they WILL reach out to you and when they do, don’t engage in their antics. The moment you do, your caught back into their web of control and it won’t be long before your blocked again. They do it because it works for them. Take it from my experience of suffering through this blocking cycle for years…. it will steal your self worth. It willl damage your heart and soul. It’s painful and unnecessary. It’s the silent treatment and the silent treatment is a form of narcissistic abuse. I’m sure if you look with open eyes about your entire relationship, specifically on how the blocker handles an argument you will see the one doing the blocking is lacking in many other areas of handling problems like an adult. Go out there and find a true partner who doesn’t give you the silent treatment any time an issue needs to be talked about. And for the ones who block back?!? Don’t lower yourself and play tit for tat. I did this for a little bit and it was only used to say “hey, how do you like it”. But it didn’t work and only hurt me in the long run. Get out now and don’t look back at that phone. Blocking is the tip of the iceberg.

    Reply
 

Join the Conversation!

We invite you to share your thoughts and tell us what you think in this public forum. Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines. A first name or pseudonym is required and will be displayed with your comment. Your email address is also required, but will be kept private. (Please note that we use gravatars here, which are tied to your email address.) A website/blog/twitter address is optional.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *