Recently, the host of, “Kids Say The Darndest Things,” comedian, actress, and entertainer Tiffany Haddish declared that she is no longer going to be an “open book.”
Although her work as a performer has primarily consisted of material from her real life experience, I gave it some thought and well, she is currently the host of a family friendly network show. Maybe the producers sat her down and had a chat with her about her image? Or, maybe she has been burned on social media by sharing too much? But, in my opinion, when you are an artist it’s it part of our role to be open and honest about your experiences as a human being. So, I did a quick search on things you shouldn’t share with others and are best kept to yourself and this list came up:
- Your goals – Apparently you are more likely to achieve your goals if you keep them to yourself.
- Your personal life – Apparently sharing your personal life will cause people to judge you, criticize you, and you’ll get unnecessary opinions from others.
- Your family drama – Apparently you are supposed to solve your issues privately and by yourself.
- Courageous and good deeds – Apparently this makes you out to be self-serving and seeking praise.
- Material belongings – Apparently this can make others jealous and make you look arrogant.
Check, check, check, check, and check. I can check everything on this list, and am starting to rethink my level of sharing. But, I am a writer, and this is what I do; this is my essence but, maybe there are some limits to try and implement into my life. More importantly, I use the word “apparently,” cause I am uncertain of the parameters of this list, and how much of it should be applied to my life.
Last night, I opened my cabinet of medication and stood there staring. I had bottles of meds dating back to over a decade. I started to pull them down and saw they were all expired and decayed and I had forgotten all the different medications I had taken over the years. Then I thought, what if I was dating someone and they happened to open my medicine cabinet? How would I explain the plethora of pills that looked like I was running a pharmacy? What if I hadn’t had “the conversation” yet that I was mentally ill, especially if I was actively trying to keep things more private? The debate on when it is the right time to tell someone you have a mood disorder is ongoing. Some say on the first date, others say wait a few weeks or even months, it’s different for everyone. But should I decide to wait, and a guy I was dating happened to see my pills, I wouldn’t have a choice and I am sure it would scare him off a bit.
I started to open the bottles and dump the old left over pills in the trash. I didn’t understand why I had kept all those medications over the years to begin with, and it felt cleansing but it also made me think if there was an underlying reason I didn’t dispose of any of them along my journey of recovery. It seemed odd for me to hold onto medications that turned stale that I would never use again. It was also weird to read the labels and not recall oh, I was on Lexapro back in 2011. I don’t remember that but ok. It showed me all the different medications I had tried over the years to try and find the right one. I felt some pride in the journey knowing that I never gave up on myself. Oh wait, delete that sentence cause #4 says not to discuss being courageous but whatever. This is going to be a minor experiment I will try a tad over the next few weeks. I am sure it will make me a better listener, so maybe this list should only apply to verbalizing my life. I can still share through my writings so maybe that’s a fair compromise.
At least for now the cabinet is empty, and I don’t have to worry about looking like a pill popping lunatic should anyone happen to stumble across the story of my mental health journey!