It’s hard to know when it is time to go back to therapy. Or is it? I’ve been out for over a year now and wonder if I can handle it and return. When I say handle it I mean I wonder if I can not allow it to cause me anxiety and frame my week. Therapy is not supposed to cause anxiety but for me it used to linger over my head, and make me anxious about going there, being there, talking there, crying there, and doing the work there. Cause let’s face it, therapy is hard work. It is not something you can take lightly if you really want results. So when do you know it’s time to get back to it?
Well, if you are thinking about it maybe that’s a sign that maybe it’s time. But it’s also my psychiatrists voice in the back of my mind as well. The last time I saw my shrink, right before I left he said, “Go see ****.” I know, ok, I get it but, what is really going to get me to pick up the phone and make an appointment? Tears? Stress? Recent poor choices? Lacking good judgement? Bad insight into how I am doing? Check, check and more check. I can check the box on all of those reasons so yeah, maybe it’s not so much a maybe situation anymore, and now has become an imperative and necessity.
Ah… and writing it down only makes it worse cause it’s one more step closer to actually going. But I’m just not 100% there, yet.