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How To Pick A Gynecologist

When I was 18-years-old, and it was time to go see a gynecologist, I remember asking a few friends if they thought it was better to have a male or female gynecologist. Some said they felt more comfortable with a female, while others said men tend to be more sensitive to female anatomy. I was on the fence, but decided to try a woman, and when I went to the appointment, and expressed that I wanted to start the pill, I remember her making me feel bad or guilty that I had lost my virginity, and was now sexually active with my boyfriend. I left feeling down on myself, and was upset. So, I dropped that gynecologist, and went to Planned Parenthood where they support safe sex without any shame or judgement. So I more or less went there to get the pill, and figured moving forward I’d find another permanent gynecologist.

Then one of my close friends recommended her gynecologist. He was a male that practiced in Beverly Hills, and although I was reluctant to get a male, he ended up being great and I stayed with him for two decades.

Then about a year ago I lost my insurance, and I had to switch from a PPO to an HMO, and he only took PPO so had to start over on the hunt for a new gynecologist.

So, I perused the list that my new HMO insurance offered, and selected one that had good ratings, and was close to home. I’ll never forget the day I wanted into my first appointment. I wasn’t expecting him to be 70 + years old and was like ok, this shall me interesting. I remember when we first sat down to chat he had this puppy that sat by my chair, and it was like one of those service dogs that people need for anxiety and stress and it worked magic. I was immediately put at ease, and it turned out to be a great appointment. On my way out of the appointment I said, “Don’t die on me.” What I meant to say was, “Don’t retire on me” but I can be stupid like that sometimes however thankfully he didn’t take offense. So, I left feeling good about my new HMO gynecologist and grateful that I found him.

On my drive home I thought about all the gynecologists I’ve encountered over the years, starting with that mean judgmental woman, then the Planned Parenthood experience, then my long time Beverly Hills Doc, and now this seasoned professional, and thought if a young woman were to ask me today what is the best gynecologist, how would I answer that question. And then it hit me.

I thought about this embarrassing experience I had years ago. I took a break from the pill and was using condoms at the time. One night I was having sex with my boyfriend and lost the condom. Somehow it got sucked up into my vagina and I was like well, it’s not going anywhere so we’ll use another one and finish having sex. And lost that one too. Obviously I needed bigger condoms but anyway. I went to the bathroom and tried to reach up inside to try and pull them out, and every time I got close and could feel the ring, it would suck up even farther so I knew I had to seek a professional. So I called my Beverly Hills gynecologist and the waiting list was months. He must have been one of the top gynecologist in Los Angeles cause I couldn’t get an appointment for weeks but obviously I couldn’t wait. Thankfully, they had another gynecologist on call that handles emergencies, and when I showed up to the appointment I was like, ok, here we go again. Am I going to get a guy or girl or what. So here I am with a really embarrassing situation and some unknown gynecologist that’s going to have to pull two condoms out of me.

So, I walked into the appointment and in walks this emergency gynecologist. It was a male. And here’s the kicker – he was gay. Now why didn’t I think of that? It’s perfect. I told him what had happened and expected him to at the very least make a face or say something but, when I told him he was like ok. So he removed the condoms and I was on my way.

I went home and realized a gay gynecologist is the best gynecologist a woman can find. There is obviously no potential for any uncomfortable sexual attracted to you, so you don’t have any anxiety about that. They don’t have harsh nails that some women have which can be uncomfortable. They don’t judge or make you feel bad about even the craziest circumstances cause let’s face it, what kind of person loses a condom in their vagina and says well it’s not going anywhere so lets finish sex then loses ANOTHER one. One condom disappearing up there should have been enough but no, I ended up with two up there, and he didn’t even flinch.

Long story short. In my opinion, the best gynecologist to pick is neither a heterosexual male or female, pick a homosexual male.

How To Pick A Gynecologist

Erica Loberg

Erica Loberg was born and raised in Los Angeles, CA. She attended Columbia University in New York and graduated with a BA in English. She is a published poet and author of Inside the Insane, Screaming at the Void, What Men Should Know About Women, What Women Should Know About Men, Diamonds From The Rough , Undressed, and I'm Not Playing.

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APA Reference
Loberg, E. (2019). How To Pick A Gynecologist. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 26, 2020, from


Last updated: 16 Jan 2019
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