I’m not going to say I’ve caused any breakups or God forbid divorces but, when it comes to my friends in committed relationships, sometimes they like to escape their lives, and come down and visit me and enjoy “my single life.”

Some of my friends smoke cigarettes they’re not supposed to, some drink in excess, others plan on spending the night yet find themselves spending the weekend.

One time I even had a friend’s boyfriend show up to “see what goes on here.” Ah, ok. He sat down and stared me down. He said every time his girlfriend comes home from spending time at my place, she is relaxed, happy, refreshed, which if find hard to believe cause most of my friends wild out when they enter my single life.

My life isn’t that exciting, and I always tell my friends that have rose colored glasses that the grass is not always greener. I’m single, no kids, and have friends getting divorced and some might think, due to the single life they briefly experience with me, that it’s all fun and games.  It’s not.  Being single is my choice, however, it’s not easy, and it’s not for everyone.

In less than a month I will be 40. I’ve spent the past few years contemplating whether or not I want kids. I told myself if it happens ok then it’s meant to be. But, I haven’t done anything to secure a relationship. I haven’t done anything to preserve my eggs. I’ve come to realize my actions speak for themselves. Having kids might not be in the cards for me, primarily cause, I don’t want them. Am I sure? I think so, and I don’t look at that side of the fence as greener, and cheerfully continue on with my single life.