Anxious behavior

Unloved in Childhood? 5 Baby Steps to Seeing Yourself Clearly

One of the legacies of a childhood in which your emotional needs weren’t met is an impaired sense of yourself. Because a child first catches a glimpse of herself in her mother’s eyes, it’s not at all unusual for an unloved daughter’s perception of herself to be utterly distorted. This can be quite literal, especially if she’s been told she’s fat or ugly, but extends into other realms as well.

As one daughter, 33, confided:
I have...
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General

Are You in Love With a Narcissist? 5 Psychological Costs

It took Sue, now 40, years to get up the courage to end her ten year marriage. “To everyone on the outside looking in, it looked as though it should have been easy to get out. We had no children. We both worked and I didn’t have to depend on him financially. I knew I was unhappy by year four but it took me another six years to untangle my feelings. He was a master...
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Anxious behavior

5 Steps to Tackle the Self-Critical Voice in Your Head

Yes, the one that tells you that you’ll never be good enough, no matter what you try, or the one that tells you that you’ll never have a close relationship because there’s nothing about you that’s even remotely lovable. Or that the worst-case scenario you’ve been worrying about at work is definitely going to happen because why would anyone think you have something to offer? Or the one that whispers that you’re a fraud and...
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General

Is Jealousy Sabotaging Your Relationship? Or Bringing You Closer?

The green-eyed Monster has been hiding in plain sight for thousands of years in ancient mythology (think Hera and Zeus); the plots of plays, poems, movies, and novels; as well as the lurid headlines of crimes committed by one enraged or betrayed lover or spouse. What is jealousy?  An intense emotional response to the real or imagined threat to losing a valued romantic relationship.
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Anxious behavior

The Insecure Daughter and Feeling Stuck: 5 Strategies to Try

My relationship with my lover seems to have ground to a halt. We’re fighting more and having less fun. I’m not ready to leave but a part of me isn’t sure whether making a commitment to work at it is smart either. We’ve been together five years and a part of me thinks that by now, we ought to have figured out how to work things out.

I have wanted to leave my job for years...
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