How to Set Boundaries with Kindness

Our boundaries should reflect compassion for ourselves and others.

What are boundaries?
Boundaries create physical and emotional space between you and others. They show people how you want to be treated – what’s okay with you and what’s not.

Boundaries are essential in all relationships – with your parents, children, friends, boss, and so on. For example, you need to set a boundary with a coworker who...


6 Signs of Perfectionism That Aren’t About Trying to Be Perfect

Are you a perfectionist?
When we think of perfectionists, we tend to think of people like Jo, Darren, and Pamela.

Jo keeps an immaculate home. It looks more like a picture out of Better Homes & Gardens than home to three young kids and a dog!  Jo spends every spare moment, cleaning, organizing, and decorating. She even folds their underwear KonMari style.

Darren spends inordinate amounts of time writing and rewriting emails and text messages....


15 Signs You’re Too Nice for Your Own Good (And What You Can Do About It)

Considering other people’s feelings and treating them with kindness and generosity is something we should all strive to do. But sacrificing our own wellbeing in order to make others happy is not.

Sometimes there’s a fine line between doing things for others and behaving like their doormat.

When you compromise who you are and what you need, people-pleasing has crossed the line from kind and generous...


Why We Abandon Ourselves and How to Stop

Do you have a hard time trusting yourself? Do you hide parts of yourself – your feelings, beliefs, and ideas – in order to fit in or please others? Do you diminish or discount your feelings because you think they don’t really matter?

This is self-abandonment.

We abandon ourselves when we don’t value ourselves, when we don’t act in our own best interest,...

holiday stress

6 Things I’m Not Doing This Holiday Season


As Christmas and the New Year approach, it’s easy to get caught up in the frenzy -- the sense that you must do more, spend more, be more. All of this pressure and unrealistic expectations can make it hard to enjoy the holidays fully. It keeps us busy and distracted from what matters most.



How to Cope with Difficult Feelings During the Holidays

My colleague Michelle Farris, LMFT wrote this new blog post about coping with difficult feelings such as anger and sadness. These are especially difficult feelings to have during the holidays when we're expected to be happy. I hope you'll benefit from Michelle's practical tips and ideas. How to Cope with Difficult Feelings During the Holidays
By Michelle Farris, LMFT
The holidays can be challenging when you’re not...