What is Codependency?

Are you codependent?
Codependency is a term we throw around lightly these days. It's great that it's become mainstream, but we're not all using the same definition. Before I delve into some other topics related to codependency,...


How to be a Happily Imperfect Blogger


I've been writing Happily Imperfect for six months now. I figured it was a good time to reflect a bit on how I've applied the principals of being "happily imperfect" to my writing.

My goal in writing this blog is to encourage you toward greater self-worth: to overcome perfectionism and people-pleasing and realize that your true, authentic self is completely worthy. You don't need to prove your worth repeatedly through...


5 reasons I Hate Asking For Favors, But Do It Anyway


We all need a favor from time to time. Your car breaks down or you need a last minute babysitter. Maybe you need an occasional ride to the airport or someone to bring a casserole when you're sick.

When my kids were small, I was in need of extra favors. I didn't have any family nearby to help. So, with two working parents and three kids, we occasionally needed to ask a...


There’s No Such Thing as a Perfect Parent


As parents, we always try to do the best we can for our kids. We want them to be healthy, happy, successful. We also want to be at our best so we can set a good example. But sometimes our good intentions go sideways. Sometimes our goal of being a great parent turns into trying to be a perfect parent. And our goal of raising great...


The People-Pleaser’s Guide to Saying No


Mark is in over his head. He's a high school math teacher, stays late every afternoon to give extra help, and leads his son's cub scout troop. And since no one else volunteered, he agreed to head up a fundraiser for new library books. His neighbor asked him to tutor his son in geometry. Mark was about to say yes when his wife gave him the "death stare." You know, that look...


Understanding Perfectionism, Eating Disorders, and Body Shame

It’s hard to feel good about your body and appearance. From an early age you’re bombarded with messages about what the ideal body should look like. You learned that you should count calories (or cut out entire food groups), workout every day, color your hair, and get a bit of Botox and then you just might look like the airbrushed images in every women’s magazine.

Instead of feeling good...


22 Ways to Love Yourself More

Before anybody else can love you, you have to love yourself.
You've heard this many times before. But what does it mean to love yourself? And how do you actually love yourself?

For various reasons, many of us find it easier to love others than to love ourselves. Sometimes we're truly quite awful to ourselves. We subject ourselves to a harsh inner critic, unhealthy relationships, toxic substances, and self-mutilation. I know how easy...


Using Your Strengths to Get Happier

How do you see yourself? It may be hard to get a realistic picture of yourself, but you do have a choice in how you see yourself. You can choose to focus on your weakness or you can choose to focus on your strengths. When you choose to emphasize your best self, you open the door to happiness - success at work, deep connections, meaningful activities, healthy habits.

It's easy to focus on what's wrong and what...