7 thoughts on “How to Set Boundaries with Kindness

  • January 30, 2019 at 10:57 am

    EXCELLENT ARTICLE. LEARNING to express our boundaries firmly but NOT aggressively is super hard & takes much much time & practice to speak without harshness. it requires constant repetion too as people we love who dont have them
    are VERY VERY resistantt.

    • January 30, 2019 at 11:24 am

      Yes, I think it’s often more of an ongoing conversation than one-time thing.

  • July 3, 2019 at 7:34 pm

    Boundaries are hard to set, I never heard anything about them when I was growing up, It is a real struggle for me to set, reading your script, made me fearful and angery, that’s because all of this has been depressed sopressed, that any thinking of setting them trigger a emotional Range and chronic tension, that I feel I am going to explode, it really terrable to think that this is a huge problem in our community, because people were made so little of when they tried to do good, I was one of them for a long time, until I got into recovery and therapy, now I hate it, or seeing in practice, thank you for the writings, so much to learn, so much practice, God bless you Tom c

  • July 6, 2019 at 11:58 pm


    Thanks for a really great article talking both about the emotions and how to handle it.

    I pot quite disturbed by my answers to the questions about anger. Your questions hit me point blank and made me realize a pattern, which now seems deeper than I thought. Do you have any article going deeper into these questions?


    • July 7, 2019 at 8:06 pm

      Emotional child hood neglect, in school and at home, I had to do and I continue to do therapy on it along with 25 minutes meditation thank you for your reply god bless [email protected]

  • May 19, 2020 at 3:12 am

    This is a really great article about why and how to set boundaries! I guess the only question I’d have left open now is how to deal with someone how continues to cross a boundary. In the first example, what if he apologizes profoundly, ensuring her he didn’t mean to hurt her, and then continues to joke about her in front of friends? How long does kindness have to tolerate hurting, how do we react to someone close to us who is continuously crossing a border that in itself may not be enough to end a relationship, but it still hurts every time it happens…?


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