4 thoughts on “How to Live with a Perfectionist

  • November 14, 2015 at 9:40 am

    #14) Seriously?

  • April 15, 2018 at 5:20 pm

    This is biggest crock of bull I have heard in my life. What she is giving for advice are things you should do in any relationship not just with someone who wants things a certain way or notices all the little things. And no people like that do not always suffer from anxiety or suffer from some self worth issues. Like really nice job making this more of someone having a mental issue into a bully as well like they attack people for not being like them. Lady please retire or go bag my produce at Whole Foods.

  • November 6, 2018 at 10:29 am

    I actually live with someone in marriage long term who is a perfectionist. I have several members in my family system so I know about this personality type well.

    I have used a system called the Enneagram over the years to help me understand myself and my partner’s personality type. I was able to give my partner tips on how to get along with me within my type (an 8) and her type (a 1) when we first start dating together years ago. We are both anger types using it differently. Very strong willed.

    I can relate to this list of tips. I have learned to understand, live and know how to relate to my partner’s inner critic and drive for perfection. She is working on improvement of herself and me at times. I don’t take it personally. We have worked on ourselves over the years which makes a big difference. We relax more. I know it is very important for me to take my partner outside the house where responsibility lies to have fun together. You can try to create fun inside the house too with movies and games. I do my share of responsibility. I have learned I get instant forgiveness with a sincere apology when I receive feedback I have impacted on my partner.

    Thank you this article Shannon. John

    • November 6, 2018 at 11:41 am

      Thanks for your thoughtful and helpful comment, John. I agree that the Enneagram is very interesting and a helpful framework for understanding ourselves and others.

      all my best,


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