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No More Excuses: Self-Care Matters

Stop Making Excuses #selfcare #excuses #perfectionist #procrastination


I’m really tired of friends and clients who won’t make time for themselves. You are important! And if you aren’t making time for yourself you are either stressed out or on your way there.

Self-care, as therapists like to call it, is something you do just for you. It’s reading a great novel, scrapbooking, buying yourself flowers, a walk with a friend. It’s really whatever refreshes and energizes you.

What excuses are you making? Excuses are easy.

  • I’m too busy.
  • I don’t have any money.
  • I’m tired.
  • My kids need me.
  • I have to work late.
  • I have to get up early.
  • It’s not that important (translation: I’m not that important).
  • I’ll do it next week.
  • I’ll start on Monday.
  • I’m too fat (thin, ugly, stupid, nervous, uncoordinated, etc).

Look, I get it. I’m busy too. I work full-time, write two blogs, and am working on some other professional projects. I’m a wife and mom with three kids at home.

But if you’re still insisting that there is no possible way for you to have some “me time”, I have to call bullshit. There’s always time for whatever you prioritize. Did you plunk yourself down, beer in hand, in front of the TV or computer today? How much time did you whittle away on Facebook or Twitter? Perhaps that is your self-care. If it truly relaxes you and brings you joy, then carry on. For most of us it’s just a distraction; a way to zone out when we’re too tired for real self-care.

Stress, like most things, is best handled proactively. This means doing things to relax and reduce your stress before it’s exploding out of you like an erupting volcano. And the only way it’s going to happen is if you stop making excuses. Stop putting yourself last. And start taking action.

Where can you find ten minutes or five dollars? Saying “yes” to yourself means saying “no” to something else. Say no to working through lunch and actually take 30 minutes to eat a proper meal. Trade 15 minutes of World of WarCraft for a walk around the block. Don’t check your work email tonight and go get a coffee with your spouse. That’s not so hard, is it?

Most of us achieve our goals one small step at a time. Stress-management is no different. It’s not an all or nothing venture. Every little act of self-care contributes to less stress, better health, and happier relationships. What will you do for yourself today?


Please share this post and encourage your friends to stop making excuses, too!


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No More Excuses: Self-Care Matters

Sharon Martin, LCSW

Sharon Martin is a licensed psychotherapist and codependency expert practicing in San Jose, CA. She is the author of The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism: Evidence-Based Skills to Help You Let Go of Self-Criticism, Build Self-Esteem, and Find Balance and several ebooks including Navigating the Codependency Maze.  

To learn more, visit Sharon's website. And please sign-up for free access to her resource library HERE (worksheets, tips, meditations, and resources for healing codependency, perfectionism, anxiety and more).

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APA Reference
Martin, S. (2018). No More Excuses: Self-Care Matters. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 29, 2020, from


Last updated: 1 Jan 2018
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