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Why So Much Hate For A Once Loving Bipolar Relationship?

Having a happy marriage or relationship is hard work and tough enough on its own; without additional complications. How much more complicated do you think it gets when you add into the mix a mood disorder such as Bipolar or Depression into the relationship?

Let me start off by saying you will not find any answer to marriage or relationships here in this post.  I want to open a dialogue with my peers to share the positive aspects of their relationship that worked.  Even if the relationship ultimately failed, feel free to share what you learned.  Share the good.  We all know the bad, we all share some understanding of sad and deep pain at the end of a relationship.  But what about the good times? What about the times when your loved one was balanced, and the illness did not rule their life or yours?

Mental Health Humor by Chato Stewart

JP: Sickness and in health, Well, unless your loved one gets diagnosed with Bipolar or mood disorder, that’s A DEALBREAKER!
Bride and Groom: YUP! … OH YA!
Caption: Is This The Truth About Love and Bipolar Relationships?!?

What Happens To Love When Bipolar Is Trying to Break Us Up?

Okay, let’s say you’re married or in a partnership/relationship with someone for some time, three to five years, maybe ten or more years.  The first dozen episodes of mania or depression have been terrifying, but with education and work and love and compassion, there was a way to work things out.

With guidance from a therapist, doctor, sermon, fortune cookie found was a road to wellness. However, the course, whether medication, psychotherapy, walks in the park, diet… whatever it was that gave balance and things are working for now…

Until one morning, for no reason, everything built is gone.  The person you loved is once again gone!  You must rebuild.  Then as you get the things together, the house of cards falls apart again, and again, and again…

The illness is tearing you apart, how much is too much??

A once loving relationship becomes a haven for pain and emotional turmoil.  You love them with all your heart, but they treat you as if they hate you.  You love them with everything you have, and they betray you over and over again. You love them with every tear, year after year, and they walk on you without a care.

Loving someone with Bipolar Disorder is not easy, and there are many horrific and traumatic stories!  Stories of the illness tearing a once caring and loving Bipolar Relationship apart, shattering them into a billion pieces.  Many times the loved ones are forced into the caregiver-role for years, even decades… at times without even knowing what they are dealing with cause their loved one has no “official” diagnosis.

There are also many success stories, even within the so-called failed relationships.  Of two people so in love, they fight the odds and the mental illness together. For years, 5, 10, 15, 20 or more they fight, before succumbing to its relentless pressure on the once loving relationship.

Others are together for many more years and even lifetimes.  Success is relative to each couple…not just to the diagnosis.  Yet, the diagnosis and the inability to keep the symptoms from affecting the core relationship is what can tear a love apart.

Do You Love someone with Bipolar?

If you love someone who experiences symptoms of Bipolar or Depression, talk about walking on eggshells, not knowing what you’re up against, never sure what to do or what is helping…

Then what if our peers are rejecting any type of treatment, the pain caused to the innocent mate/caregiver/loved one is crushing!

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous. It does not brag, does not get puffed up,5does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury. It does not rejoice over unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

Please comment below:

Do/Did You Love someone with Bipolar? 

How many years were you together?

What are/were some of the most successful tools use/d to help your bipolar relationship? 

Share your story


Consumer Ambassador
Chato Stewart

Dig Deeper:

Webinar: Loving Someone Bipolar: Marriage Proposal

A Bipolar Relationship – Is it survivable?

Valentine’s Day: Can People with Bipolar Disorder Have Healthy Relationships?

Why So Much Hate For A Once Loving Bipolar Relationship?

Chato Stewart

Chato Stewart has a mission, to draw and use humor as a positive tool to live, to cope with the debilitating effects symptoms of mental illness. Chato Stewart is a Mental Health Hero and Advocate. Recovery Peer Specialist board-certified in Florida. Chato is the artist behind the cartoons series Mental Health Humor, Over-Medicated, and The Family Stew - seen here in his blog posts. The cartoons are drawn from his personal experience of living with bipolar disorder (and other labels).

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APA Reference
Stewart, C. (2018). Why So Much Hate For A Once Loving Bipolar Relationship?. Psych Central. Retrieved on October 1, 2020, from


Last updated: 19 Jan 2018
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