New Year’s represents a new beginning
What I like about New Year’s is that I can start fresh. I do this by asking the question, “How will I be a better person next year?”
So, I ask you, “How will you be a better person next year?” What do you need to do that you haven’t been doing? What do you need to stop doing that you have been doing?
I’ll share with you my own example. I know precisely what I need to do to be a better person.
- I need to create my days and weeks in such a way that I don’t exhaust myself; because when I exhaust myself there is less space between the stimulus (whatever happens out there) and my response. In our overly busy world I challenge myself to create space for myself, yet I believe this is essential if I want to be a better person.
- I need to meditate, which is a proven way to create more space between the stimulus and my response. Meditation creates space in my neural pathways. And it creates the right kind of space. By meditating I decrease the neural paths that link upsetting sensations to medial prefrontal cortex (the self-referencing center in the brain). Therefore, I don’t react to momentary distress with the assumption that something is wrong with me. And, meditation increases the neural paths that link the fear centers to the lateral prefrontal cortex (the part of the brain that creates a rational, balanced perspective). Therefore, I am better able to regulate my emotional responses.
Said simply: meditation allows me to be less reactive and more emotionally mature.
Which brings me to point #3:
- I need to stop tolerating my own immaturity. I do this in two ways. First, I focus on my personal conduct. I focus on how I want to behave, regardless of what another person is doing or saying. Second, I create contexts in my life in which I feel safe and respected and appreciated. This allows me to conduct myself much more maturely than when I am in contexts in which I feel threatened and disrespected.
- I need to inspire myself—believe that my life has a purpose and that I am fulfilling that purpose.
If you want to be a better you in 2015, consider joining us at our retreat in Januay. During this retreat we will each create our own personal narratives, learn new skills, and experience being part of a very unique and supportive community of people—all of whom are committed to developing their emotional maturity.