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Archives for changes in partner - Page 2

affirmation of partner

What Presidential Campaigns Can Teach You About Your Relationship

If you are human, in a relationship and living on this planet there will be decisions to make and problems to solve. They may be intrinsic to your circumstances, imposed upon you by outside factors, or a function of your personal needs and goals.

For most couples issues related to jobs, residence, children, socializing, religion, sex, money, in-laws and more demand decisions but often invite dissent.

If you want a clear example of...
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affair

How Different Are the Private and Public Versions of Your Relationship?

Almost everyone has felt the shock of hearing that a couple that seemed “so great together” was breaking up.

It can also be just as shocking to observe the public interaction of a couple only to wonder, “Why are these people together?”

Having worked many years with couples, I've come to understand that no one but the partners involved really know the differences in the private or public versions of their relationship.

While some differences in the...
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Anxiety

The Big Value of “Small Talk” in Our Emotional Lives

There is nothing small about “small talk.”

Defined as polite conversation about unimportant or uncontroversial matters, especially used on social occasions, small talk has often been seen in a pejorative or dismissive way.

Actually, small talk has a much broader meaning. Whether we love it or dread it, whether it serves us as a “ tool or trait,” we use “small talk” for meeting important psychological needs. We use it...
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affair

Re-Connect With an Ex? Crucial Considerations

Recycling is a good idea, except when it comes to relationships.

Regardless of what people tell themselves about the time invested, the good times missed, the great sex, or the feeling that things will be different; in most cases the re-connection with an ex rarely brings a better outcome.

Research tells us that rekindling a relationship decreases happiness. Studies of college grads as well as larger national...
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affair

Renovate Your Relationship: Replace Unsafe Couple Dynamics

Regardless of how new or old your relationship, most couples can benefit from changing relationship dynamics that cause marital deterioration.

In a recent study in The Journal of Family Psychology, researchers, Lavner, Bradbury and Karney found in surveying 251 couples every six months for the first four years of their marriage, that despite the wish for marital fulfillment those whose marriages deteriorated were dealing with unsafe dynamics like...
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attractiveness

Enhancing Your Sexuality: Six Important Strategies

Anna Freud invited us to consider that “Sex is something you do, sexuality is something you are.”

Building on this, we can define sexuality as the way we experience and express ourselves as sexual beings. What makes sexuality a complex dimension is that it is determined by many factors including our body, gender, age, culture, history, media, religion and family.

What makes our experience of our sexuality important is that it affects our overall...
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Anger

Are You Invalidating Your Partner – Without Realizing It?

Probably the hardest things to change are the things we don't realize we're doing – like invalidating our partner.

Thanks to a plethora of self-help books on relationships, most partners, whether dating, committed or long married, have become aware of the value of listening for improving understanding and connection. Most recognize or are reminded by their partners when they are not listening.

Validation is much more than listening or even active listening. It is...
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Authentic happiness

Who Says ‘I Love You’ First? Unexpected Findings

If you were asked whether you think men or women are the first to say, “ I love you” in romantic relationships, what would you say?

Most people – both men and women - believe it is women.  Such beliefs are congruent with those who have studied gender differences. For example,

Women are generally thought to be more interested in and willing to express love and commitment than men.
Women are considered to have an easier...
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Cancer

Strategies for Healing the Psychological Impact of Medical Illness

In the preceding blog, we considered the importance of recognizing medical illness as psychological trauma.

In this blog we report on an interview with Michele Rosenthal, author of the trauma recovery memoir, BEFORE THE WORLD INTRUDED, survivor, and host of ‘Your Life After Trauma'.  

Diagnosed with a rare disease, Stevens Johnson Syndrome, at age thirteen, Michele journeyed through two decades of undiagnosed PTSD to eventual recognition, recovery...
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Anxiety

Medical Illness as Psychological Trauma: Overlooked Pain

In this era of advanced medical detection and intervention, the medical care of patients and the reduction of mortality for life threatening illness has never been greater.  Against this backdrop of success, however, what is often overlooked by professionals, family, even patients, is the experience of medical illness as psychological trauma.

While some efforts like the emerging field of Psycho-oncology are starting to address the totality of the patient and the American Psychiatric Association...
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