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By The Grace Of God

“Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.” God 

Something everything goes wrong. Sometimes when things go wrong everything goes right. 

amublance photoTuesday I went to an eye doctor. I took my wife along with me. A friend met us there. The idea was that my friend would sit with Sylvia while I was in the eye exam. My wife suffers from dementia and needs somebody to sit with her. I was just handing in my paperwork when my friend said: “Is it okay for Sylvia to sit like this?” I turned around and saw my wife’s head buried in her lap. We lifted up and head. She was drooling and nonresponsive. I looked at my friend and said: “Maybe we should call 911?” In about half a minute or less we asked the receptionist to make the call.

Of course, it is a tragic moment. But there was a man sitting in the eye doctor’s office. He came over to assist. It seems that the man was a nurse in an emergency room. He instructed me to keep Sylvia’s head up and I did so. The man said that she might be having a stroke or perhaps she was suffering from low sugar. I saw a jar of candy and suggested that we give her one. The nurse said that this wasn’t a good idea because if he was having a stroke it might choke her. In about fifteen minutes the ambulance came.

I took about a twenty-minute ride to the hospital. I never rode in an ambulance before and it was quite an empowering experience. The ambulance blew its siren and cars moved over and they cautiously went through red lights. Once at the hospital they whisked Sylvia into a scan of the brain. They then did an e.k.g. among other tests. Everything came back negative. They ruled out a stroke, bleeding on the brain, blood sugar, and heart attack. One of the nurses said the symptoms seemed like a seizure. Well, two days later Sylvia was released without them finding anything wrong. They adjusted her medicines and suggested that may have been the cause.

That is the thing about life. You make your plans and then there is a calamity. But as I just illustrated in the midst of the turmoil, at the most crucial juncture there was somebody there to give a hand. The facts are what they are, it is how one interprets them that matters. One, of course, could get upset with things just for happening. On the other hand, one could be extremely grateful for having somebody to assist in a time of need. The difference therein lies the state of mind.

I am very happy with the ways things turned out. In fact, I couldn’t have been happier, because in the long run no harm was done. If anything I was merely inconvenienced for several days.

Still one has to put everything into context. One day Sylvia is going to die or perhaps I will go first. Again the facts are constant and how we interpret them makes all the difference in the world. I would hope that when the time comes to pass I will be grateful for the blessings given rather than upset at the loss of a loved one. I know my wife’s demise will be very painful, I did my fair share of crying in the hospital. I was simply sad and I hurt.

There is not a life on Earth that doesn’t go through pain and sorrow. There is not a life that isn’t full of some kind of difficulty. Unfortunately, the majority of the world does not process their lives in the correct way. I can state this because I see how people treat other people. I can see man’s inhumanity to man. I observe endless wars. I see people in abject poverty while others have more than they could ever possibly need. I see cruelty, materialism, hatred, and selfishness. I hear the cursings of God’s name.

I want to end this with a funny and true story. I had a job with UPS during the Christmas season. I was a driver’s helper. The driver would find the package and I’d would run to the door and deliver it. Whenever the driver couldn’t find a package he would utter foul curses using God’s name in vain. As a Christian, this upset me but I didn’t say anything. One time he was looking for a package I suggested: “Why don’t you pray to God to find a package?” The driver came back and said, “Why would God be concerned about me finding a package?” I said, “Well if you blame him for the ones you can’t find then I’m sure He can help you to find them.”

Please check out this book called “I Should Have Been A Rock Star” It is a science fiction book with some twisted humor. It is probably one of my best works.

Photos by Eddie~S,

By The Grace Of God

John Kaniecki

John Kaniecki is a full-time caregiver for his wife Sylvia. He is a published writer and works with the Church of Christ. John has lived with bipolar for over thirty years and has been hospitalized nine times, three of which were committed. John has chronicled his life story in his memoirs "More Than The Madness". Also of note is John's book of poetry "Murmurings Of A Mad Man" which are poems written about being committed in Graystone Psychiatric Hospital. John believes in the power of words to change the world for the better. His website can be seen here. His books can be seen on Amazon. You can visit his personal blog "Turn A Page Or Two" here.

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APA Reference
Kaniecki, J. (2018). By The Grace Of God. Psych Central. Retrieved on February 24, 2019, from


Last updated: 7 Jun 2018
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 7 Jun 2018
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