“If the eyes are the windows to the soul, my words must be their DNA” FeatherLeaf

The fascination with being a rock star is something that I believe everybody of my generation dreamed about. It seemed, from our youthful vantage points that it was some ideal life. With ‘money for nothing and the chicks for free’. 

Now that I am older and have more understanding I can see that being a rock star probably isn’t all the we thought it would be. Fame, for one thing is not all it is cut out to be. Being recognized at sight and being hounded by well wishers might be great for an afternoon, but for a lifetime, it must be horrible. Of course the prevalent use of drugs among rock stars only goes to indicate that the life is not fulfilling. People with healthy, balanced lives don’t need an artificial escape.

When I was in my early twenties I was going in and out of psychiatric hospitals. I never thought that I would have a normal life, in that I never thought that I would be able to handle a job and work. So I wrote song lyrics with the hopes of making a big score, so my finances would be taken care of. Here is one of those early works.

I Am Rock and Roll

On the highway doing ninety five
Thanking God that I’m still alive
Got my pedal down to the floor
The crowd is screaming wanting more
Music is a fire on the radio
Don’t have that far for me to go

I am rock and roll
Got a juke box for a soul
I am rock and roll
Got a juke box for a soul

Spent time in dorm sixty two
Searching my mind for what is true
The doctor’s tell me what to think
The place smells it’s a real stink
They gave me some yellow pills
Told me it will cure my ills

I am rock and roll
Got a juke box for a soul
I am rock and roll
Got a juke box for a soul

Well I love a girl named Leslie
But she don’t have time for me
She’s a beautiful Jesus freak
I think about her every week
Hoping to God she’ll come my way
Hope she likes me hopes she’ll stay

I am rock and roll
Got a juke box for a soul
I am rock and roll
Got a juke box for a soul

Some notes of explanation is that ‘dorm sixty two’ was the name of the ward in Graystone Hospital which I was committed in.  ‘Leslie’ was a young lady I cared about who didn’t have feelings for me.

Now ironically my life has turned full circle. Not only did I recover and go back to college, I got a job. First I was stocking shelves in Sears. After that I got a job with an engineering company. Able to support myself I got married. Now unfortunately my wife Sylvia is very ill with dementia. I cannot work as she needs constant care. So instead I write books, hoping that it would one day pay the bills. I have done nicely in getting published but not in getting sales.

Still the rock star theme is prevalent in my life. In my humorous but serious science fiction book entitled “I Should Have Been A Rock Star” this is exhibited.  If you would like to support me and make a purchase, that would be most welcome. The book would make an excellent Christmas present. https://johnkaniecki.weebly.com/i-should-have-been-a-rock-star.html