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Now Is The Time For Help

seduction photo“Physician heal thyself” 

There has been a string of allegations regarding sexual abuse. Starting with Harvey Weinstein and being followed by Hollywood celebrities and other famous people who I really don’t know who they are. There is a pattern in these events. Some women, or men, who were abused come out and make their bold declarations. Then the accused admits to some type of sexual impropriety and seeks some type of therapy.

Public figures, especially politicians are the worst form of scum that America produces. I vividly recall President Bill Clinton lying about having sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky. Clinton was adamant in his refusal, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman!” When a blue dress smeared with Bill Clinton’s sperm appeared on the scene things changed. Bill’s defense was some of the most bizarre double speak that the world had ever heard.  “It depends upon what the meaning of the word is, is”.

Things got even worse and more hypocritical in the story, if you can believe it. In comes Jesse Jackson to the scene to give Bill Clinton counseling. Jesse became Bill’s spiritual adviser. After all the sin of adultery is a hefty sin in the Bible. Unfortunately and hypocritically Jesse Jackson was having an affair with one Karin Stanford, an activist with the Rainbow Coalition, during this period of time. So in effect somebody committing adultery was advising on the same matter.

Let us get real about things. We all have some kind of problems in our life. Human sexuality is a difficult thing to handle. Depending how one defines sexual perversions they exist and even abound in our society. Having sex with children is still one area which is clearly taboo world wide, despite efforts to loosen restrictions. Still there is some ambiguous line which if one crosses they need to get intervention. I believe that if you are in a permanent monogamous relationship with another person and you cheat, it’s time for intervention. Also if you use any position or power to coerce, force or manipulate another person into having sex, you need to get outside intervention.

Let me state it clearly, now is the time for help, not when you get caught or exposed. The difference is everything in the world. If one comes to the realization that their improper sexual behavior is hurting other people and address it, then I have the greatest respect for such a person. A strong person knows when they need help and a strong person asks for help. However if your repentance only takes place once the dirty deeds are made public your sorrow is merely an act or diversion to save face.

We are living in an era where it is hard to find a genuine hero. To me a hero doesn’t lack humanity, everybody has faults and problems, I know I certainly do. But there and boundaries and limits that we must enforce for the good of all. I am even okay with people breaking those boundaries and limits if after such violation they seek help in not repeating their offense. If such a person is you, now is the time for help!

Photos by oldambt,

Now Is The Time For Help

John Kaniecki

John Kaniecki is a full-time caregiver for his wife Sylvia. He is a published writer and works with the Church of Christ. John has lived with bipolar for over thirty years and has been hospitalized nine times, three of which were committed. John has chronicled his life story in his memoirs "More Than The Madness". Also of note is John's book of poetry "Murmurings Of A Mad Man" which are poems written about being committed in Graystone Psychiatric Hospital. John believes in the power of words to change the world for the better. His website can be seen here. His books can be seen on Amazon. You can visit his personal blog "Turn A Page Or Two" here.

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APA Reference
Kaniecki, J. (2017). Now Is The Time For Help. Psych Central. Retrieved on November 15, 2018, from


Last updated: 28 Nov 2017
Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 28 Nov 2017
Published on All rights reserved.