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Mother’s Day – Truth and Fantasy

Mother's Day Reality vs Fantasy

When a special day like an anniversary or birthday rolls around, a little fantasy comes along with it.  Maybe your love will do something unexpected and romantic.  Perhaps your family will have supper and a nice relaxing evening together all planned out.  The same kind of thinking can apply to a day like Mother’s Day.

A small part of my mind wanted to wander into Fantasyland.  Everyone doing their best to stay peaceful with each other, not having to lift a finger in the kitchen all day, being taken out on a fun outing while being showered with complements from my family.  That sounds like an awesome day, doesn’t it?

I did receive wonderful compliments from my family, went out to get plants for the garden (my gift), got some nice cards, and there was about 2 minutes of complete silence in the van once during the day.  Nobody swept me off my feet or put me in a throne, but that’s not really what motherhood is about anyway.

Personal Sacrifice and Precious Moments

Being a mother involves personal sacrifice – your time, your energy, your focus, your emotions.  It always does, and there’s really no way to take a vacation from that.  Even when you are on a nice date with your husband or on an extended trip for business, you’ve likely done a lot in advance to be sure your young ones are well taken care of.  Your payoff comes in precious moments – a quick but honest “thank you”, little kisses, a shared laugh, a squishy hug, excitement over a good grade or accomplishment, and more.

On Mother’s Day, I and many other moms around the world were still “on duty” in some way.  Even with the cards, gifts, and compliments, I still did many typical mom-ish things for and with my kids.  I got their lunch, tended to their owies, gave them consequences, listened and watched them practice various music lesson materials, and kept at them during the bedtime routine.  All in a day’s work for a mom.

Reality Better Than Fantasy

So while a spa day or a shopping spree would be pretty fun, my Mother’s Day was spent doing everyday parenting things.  Someday, my kids will be up and out and I won’t be able to do much hands-on mothering anymore.  That I only get to do right here and right now.  That’s just fine with me – my fantasy spa day can wait.

Creative Commons License photo credit: fizzee*

Mother’s Day – Truth and Fantasy

Erika Krull, MS, LMHP

Erika Krull, MS, LMHP is a practicing licensed mental health counselor in Nebraska.

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APA Reference
Krull, E. (2011). Mother’s Day – Truth and Fantasy. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 6, 2020, from


Last updated: 10 May 2011
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