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How To Make Your Parenting More Effective Right Now #3

Parenting Tip - Lower Your Voice For More Effectiveness

You’ve seen two helpful ways to make your parenting more effective in a short period of time – knowing that you are in control and knowing how to let go of your kids’ responsibilities.  And I’m about to show you yet another quick strategy.  This time, it’s about a tool you use and have with you all the time – your voice.

Your Voice Is A Powerful Parenting Tool

Your voice can convey so many things to your kids.  Your tone, volume, speed, volume, and minor inflections can give words a lot of depth and meaning.  Many parents tend to raise their voice when they get frustrated.  It’s very common – I do it too – but it doesn’t always give the result you want.

Think about it for a moment.  When someone yells at you in anger, what are you mostly responding too?  Most likely, it’s the emotion.  When your emotion is elevated, it can spike your kids’ emotions as well.  And when everyone is really emotional, nobody’s really listening or communicating very well.

Go Slow And Low With Your Voice

Here’s an alternative to try when you are feeling your frustration or anger build.  Instead of raising your voice, make your voice as quiet and low-pitched as possible.  Why can this work?  Because it makes you sound more calm, more serious, and it makes the kid tune their ears to what you are saying.  Instead of you trying to shout over them, step close to them and do something they won’t see coming.

When you keep your voice low and slow, watch how the emotional levels of your kids change.  You really just want them to listen better and do what you say when you say it.  This method can really help you make it happen, and you can try it today.

Readers – let me know what you think of this.  Test it out and tell me what happens!

Creative Commons License photo credit: Garrettc

How To Make Your Parenting More Effective Right Now #3

Erika Krull, MS, LMHP

Erika Krull, MS, LMHP is a practicing licensed mental health counselor in Nebraska.

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APA Reference
Krull, E. (2011). How To Make Your Parenting More Effective Right Now #3. Psych Central. Retrieved on June 5, 2020, from


Last updated: 12 Feb 2011
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