Need treatment? Find help or get online counseling right now!

Archives for Self-soothing

Coping Skills

Tiny Buddha’s 365 Tiny Love Challenge: An Interview with Lori Deschene


Strengthening relationships and feeling less lonely is a challenge for emotionally sensitive people and can be overwhelming. Tiny Buddha's 365 Tiny Love Challenges offers a step-by step model that is easily understood and gives the reader a way to move forward. I am grateful to Lori Deschene, the author, for answering a few questions about her work.

How did you get the idea for Tiny Buddha’s 365 Tiny Love Challenges?

I knew I wanted to write a book about strengthening...
Continue Reading

Coping Skills

Skills to Welcome Your Day When Past Fears Haunt You

The sun's up, the alarm clock sounds off and you peel your eyes open. What are your thoughts? I'm wondering if you squeeze your eyes shut and wish the day were over. Maybe you wake up tense with a boulder in your throat and an upset stomach. Maybe you have a low-grade sadness that the day just doesn't matter.

I've had that experience. For too long I struggled with anxiety about facing the day. Unfortunately I...
Continue Reading

Coping Skills

Creating Emotional Comfort in Your Home



 

Emotionally sensitive people are often affected strongly by their environment and different people are soothed by different types of settings. Maybe a loft in an artsy area of town or a house in the country or a townhome in a busy area of the city fits with the environment you love. But maybe you are living in suburbia when you are a city person at heart or a nature lover living in a big city. While it may...
Continue Reading

Coping Skills

Using Creativity to Develop Coping Skills



Emotionally sensitive people are often artistic. Being artistic usually means having a strong appreciation of the senses, and information taken in through seeing, hearing, touching and tasting. They may also have a love of movement, such as dance.

The emotionally sensitive person may have an active imagination and create works of visual art or spend time writing. They are often passionate about helping others.

These attributes are gifts, and can also be ways to cope with...
Continue Reading

Borderline Personality Disorder

Letting Go of Judgments

The cost of judging is quite high, particularly for emotionally sensitive people. Think how you would live your life if you weren't afraid of being judged, either by yourself of others?

Judging and fear of being judged often keeps people in a trap - an emotional jail. Instead of living your life the way you would love to, you live safely, doing what is acceptable, so...
Continue Reading

Coping Skills

25 Suggestions for Living a Contented Life, Part 2

In the last post, I listed twelve suggestions for managing more intense emotions and living a contented life. Today's post has the remaining thirteen. There are many more ideas that are not listed.

When you're feeling upset, it's difficult to problem-solve or think of what actions might help. Keeping a list of what works for you could be an important step for coping successfully.  It's also true that building strong basics in...
Continue Reading

Borderline Personality Disorder

Understanding Shame

Understanding emotions, being able to observe them in ourselves, and knowing the information they give us is an important part of living effectively. For example, fear tells us to take action or freeze to protect ourselves. When fear is based on true facts versus imagined or misinterpreted information, that message to self-protect can be lifesaving. That message is perfectly clear -- you are in danger.

Sometimes, though, the message our emotions are...
Continue Reading

Coping Skills

Compassion Fatigue


Do you ever feel like you simply can't listen to another word about a difficult experience or loss? You may be experiencing compassion fatigue.

Therapists, nurses, doctors, nannies, childcare workers, nursing home caregivers and other people who focus on helping on a regular basis often experience compassion fatigue. Listening to heartbreak and caring about the troubles of others can be stressful and emotionally tiring.

The emotionally sensitive, who are keenly aware of the emotions...
Continue Reading

Borderline Personality Disorder

How Emotionally Sensitive People are Similar to Fighter Pilots


In the book, "Why We Make Mistakes," Joseph Hallinan relates an amazing story about a 1972 airplane crash. When Captain Robert Lofe, the pilot of Eastern Airlines Flight 401, was making his final approach to Miami International Airport, he noticed something was wrong. He had put the landing gear down, but the indicator light didn't come on.

He circled around and decided to level off to determine what the problem was.

He didn't...
Continue Reading