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Nature VS Nurture


I have been so fortunate to cross paths with one of the loveliest ladies that I have been lucky enough to now consider a friend. This wonderful person has had a tough road to say the very least. She has not only had to cut ties with the people in her life that have been closest to her, but has also been put onto a path where she has had to choose to reevaluate her life, in essence this comes at a very high cost. She is learning to love herself again after years of being told she is not worthy of love. Her path is rocky, and her will to carry on is forged out of sheer strength and determination. I am in awe of her and her strength, and she is a beacon of light and hope to so many, even if she doesn’t realize that yet.

When the people in our lives, the ones who are just supposed to love us unconditionally don’t, we are left with a void that is as deep as an ocean, and we are often left wondering what it is that we have done wrong. In this woman’s case, she has done nothing wrong, she was born into a very toxic environment to a woman who was in desperate need of help that nobody was willingly to give her. During her lifetime, my friend was the victim of unspeakable things, which left not only deep trust issues, but also the beginnings of some severe psychological trauma. This is where many psychologists argue nature vs nurture or a combination of the both.

As it stands, my friend is actively seeking treatment for her self-loathing, low self-esteem and trust issues, while coming to terms with the realization that there are people who care, and people who want nothing but good things for her. She is being proactive in her care and while she is taking baby steps, she is taking those steps, and it is a wonder to behold.

Years of abuse and untreated mental illness have very convincing ways of telling a person that they are worthless, it takes an immense amount of effort on the part of others to reach out and listen to the person struggling. Too many people these days blame attention seeking behaviour on someone who is in crisis situations. Everyone has a story, please be kind, because we never know what someone is battling inside of him or her.

If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out, it’s one of the strongest and bravest things that you can ever do. You are never alone.

Please call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 24/7 at 1-800-273-8255


Nature VS Nurture

Nicole Lyons

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APA Reference
Lyons, N. (2015). Nature VS Nurture. Psych Central. Retrieved on May 30, 2020, from


Last updated: 2 Oct 2015
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