My little sister is getting married next weekend and I am absolutely bursting with excitement. She is going to be the most stunning bride and the wedding itself is going to be beyond lovely. This evening I will be preparing one of the most delectable dishes to bring with me to her bachelorette party kick-off. But first, I’m leaving the children with their Nana while I spend the day getting pampered because for the next one hundred sixty eight hours, I’m pretty much booked solid. Even though this week consists of some of the happiest events of my families lives, this kind of busy excitement can send someone with anxiety or mood disorders right into, “pass me that ativan, I’m going home,” territory. I’ve got a plan put into place that will hopefully prevent any anxiety from creeping in, panic attacks from taking over and let me enjoy all of the festivities.
In my previous blogs where I have touched on chronic and debilitating anxiety I have provided tips on how to ease it but I have never written a blog on situational anxiety before. Situational anxiety typically appears in the event where people are required to preform or address groups of people; you could call it stage fright. While I’m not really going to be preforming in front of large groups of people (I hope) I will be addressing some, some of which I haven’t seen or spoken to in years. If I’m being completely honest with all of you this idea scares me a little bit so I’ve started telling myself, “I’m not anxious, I’m excited,” and so far it’s really working. I’m using stress to my advantage and it’s giving me a real sense of control, which is a complete game changer when it comes to anxiety.
As I said before my schedule is jam-packed but the key for me is to keep it somewhat relaxed. I really don’t work well with lists that leave no room for me to deviate from them. I make the lists and I get everything on them accomplished but if I am too painstakingly meticulous and don’t produce results when the list says I should have, I get triggered. I know my limits, I know what sets me off, and under amped up circumstances it is definitely not the time to test those.
My family is very supportive, thank goodness. My sister deserves the wedding of her dreams, and she’s going to get it. My family has put absolutely no pressure on me (I think they think I haven’t noticed this) they’re absolutely amazing. Their only requirement is that I have fun, and I’m all about the fun. This excitement leading up to the Big Day is a really good feeling, one that I have also prepared for by putting in a call to my psychiatrist and filing my script for my “mania preparedness kit” just in case.
I’m confident that everything is going to go smoothly, but am prepared for any hiccups along the way. “I’m not anxious, I’m excited,” is working in this situation, but I am packing the ativan in my clutch for safety measures.