Palos Heights, IL – Mr. Grey, a prominent member of the rodent community, was found slain in the home of Mr. John Murray, II on Tuesday, October 16. Five murder suspects have been identified. Make your best guess on who committed this heinous crime.
Upon returning home between his morning job and evening job, Mr. Murray found the deceased’s body in a tattered state on the living room floor. Although local authorities have identified five primary suspects for this heinous crime, Mr. Murray has definitive evidence to implicate the guilty party. Listed below are criminal profiles of the leading suspects.
Patience, a reclusive black cat with a history of erratic behavior around Halloween leads the suspect list. In past years, she viciously attacked her cat-mate Penelope during the month of October. Although she was found sleeping in the master bedroom closet when Mr. Murray discovered Mr. Grey, she could have done her dirty work before retreating from the crime scene. Investigators found some grey hairs on her back. Possible motive: she does not like any competition for affection.
Mr. Murray reported the crime shortly after finding the body at the crime scene. Possessing a clever mind and gentle demeanor, he could have deliberately reported the crime to avoid suspicion. In an uncharacteristic manner, he washed his hands and face repeatedly with anti-bacterial soap after he reported the crime scene. Possible motive: He fiercely protects his especially beloved kitty, Diabla.
Sneakers a.k.a. PurSneakity
An author and authority on BAD HABITS, Sneakers shows his aggression often. In his infamous book, Tails of Bad Habits, he firmly stated, “Mouses are Louses who don’t belong in Houses!” A small drop of blood was observed on his right, front paw shortly after the discovery of the crime scene. However, this could have resulted from his previous encounter earlier that day with Mr. Murray. Angry that Mr. Murray wasn’t paying him enough attention, Sneakers scratched Mr. Murray’s arm drawing noticeable blood. Possible motive: He holds extremely prejudiced attitudes towards all members of the Rodent community.
Diabla is a mild-mannered kitty with red eyes who stares into space as if she were seeing demons. On the evening before the murder, she was observed gazing at the kitchen stove for hours. Perhaps she was seeing a demon; perhaps she was hearing noises from Mr. Grey or one of his companions. She smelled of kitty litter that night. Possible motive: She believed she was performing important work for the “Evil One”.
Despite several rounds of hypnosis and EMDR, Dr. Loftus struggles with an intense phobia of spiders. Although her alibi of working from 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. on the day of Mr. Grey’s murder appears solid, she could have hired a “Hitmouse” to do her dirty work. After all, she was observed on her cellphone shortly before Mr. Grey was found by Mr. Murray. Possible Motive: She does not like anything creepy in the home.
The Verdict: a Little Fun Eases Stress.
All suspects agree with this verdict. A little fun can offer a lot of relief from stress. What better time of the year to indulge our inner-child need for fun and fantasy than Halloween? Even if you don’t have a party to attend, dress up as a favorite character anyway – perhaps when doling out Halloween goodies to the little goblins. BTW, the guilty party was Diabla.
Photos of black cat and mouse are under license from Shutterstock
Other photos by Jessica Loftus